@Denver baby,
Denver baby wrote:
So here is the deal. I don't really use social media, let alone understand it. However my man of 3 and 1/2 years is obsessed. Not that I care. The problem I'm having is that lately I have noticed that he has CONSTANTLY been liking his exes sexy pictures, ONLY the ones where she is all dolled up and sexy. Never one where it includes any one or anything else but her tits and sexy selfie face. I find it a bit hard to not get jealous over this especially because she brought about problems in our relationship about a year or so in when they were talking and being very flirty (wishing things worked out sort of crap) now he says he isn't talking to her now but how would I know. Anyway, I guess the point is that if he is ever gonna like a picture of another girl it is guaranteed always a sexy one. Does this mean he honestly has eyes for other girls and not just me? On top of the fact that as far as facebook and social media go he really keeps "us" on the down low, meaning he never mentions me or posts a pic of us together. Which I wouldn't care about if he (or what seems to me) wasn't constantly checking out all these other women and giving them likes because they have sexy pictures. Should I be worried that the next hot girl who shows interest in him he will just ditch me for? Do I have a right to be jealous?
First: Although you initially disclaim using social media and not understanding it, the remainder of your post proves otherwise. You know and understand enough to follow your man's social media accounts and to scrutinize what he is posting and what he is "liking".
Second: Your man behaves like a single man in his online activity when he is not a single man. This is disrespectful to you and your relationship.
Third: You have the right to feel alarmed about his conduct. He's not some "prize" that you have to worry about someone else stealing. Bottom line, other women are not the problem and you're unnecessarily devoting emotional energy to "jealousy". His conduct is the problem. You should be most concerned that he's not respecting or nurturing his relationship with you. If he wants to behave like a wolf online and disrespect his relationship with you, then you should consider whether this man is the right man for you.
Fourth: Have a conversation (not a fight) with your man about his conduct and let him know that he's free to do whatever he wants. You're not his jailer. But, if he continues to disrespect the relationship (e.g., essentially hiding his relationship with you in the online world and behaving like a single man), then that will tell you all you need to know about his commitment to you and your relationship.
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