@lovemeforver,
Emotional affair, clearly.
Don't be surprised if you find that even knowing you could go too far, are bound to get caught, and are risking losing "everything" you treasure is not enough to get you to stop.
It would be noble of you to stop it for the sake of your loved ones, my guess though is that it's something about *yourself* that you need to put your finger squarely on.
In my younger years I had missed out on girls who had been showing interest in me because it's several years later when I had gone far away that I realised that that was enough to count as showing interest. That realisation brought about a constant state of regret.
So much so that it turned into a phobia and I could not keep myself from going to the other extreme of reading too much into every little 'sign'. I lost way too many friends owing to this state of mind, but the urge, the phobia, was too strong.
It's only when I surmised that whichever girls had been presently responding positively to something sexual with me seemed to have systematically had some forms of emotional abuse in store for me down the road that I finally told myself:
"Look, normal women do not want an affair with a guy like me. Any woman who does has her own plans about what's in it for her, and it's nothing to do with exploring my body."
And in there was my compelling reason to finally rest easy that there's no regret to fear from here onwards.
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