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Fri 27 Aug, 2004 09:41 pm
Hi everyone, I was hoping I could get some help. I'm 19 and my boyfriend is 20, I've known him for well over a year now but we just started romantically dating a couple months ago. I love him, I know I do i have no doubts about it, and I know he feels the same. We've started talking about marriage. I think we're ready, I just don't know if it's too soon. Is there an age limit, or an age that is exceptable? Or should we just go with it and see where it takes us? I really don't think I could see myself with anyone else but him he means a lot to me. This isn't my first serious relationship and I can honestly say that I never felt this way about any other man in my life. I'd really like to hear what others have to say. thanks a bunch!
Each of you should have finished your education and each of you should be self-supporting.
He just bought a house and supports himself (long story with his family) and i've been supporting myself since I was 17 because my parents felt that I was old enough to get a job and pay for things I needed myself even on my dads very comfortable income. I'm in the process of getting an associates degree and working full time. He's working full time and he's unsure what he wants to go to school for so he's taking the year off.
I should add that now I don't live with my father, I live with my mother and my step-father who make almost nothing with their jobs, so I need to support myself because I am the oldest and I have 3 younger siblings who are not yet old enough to hold jobs (they're still in highschool/middle school/elementary. Thank god for the Pell grant, without that I couldn't go to school.
You're young
You're young and there's no need to rush. There's a big difference between being friends and being in a relationship. Your romantic relationship is new. Love is so exciting when it's new. See how you feel about each other when the initial excitement of the relationship fades away. There may be a LOT about him that will be revealed as time goes by.
true, very true, we will probably wait a while, see where this thing goes. I know I don't want to rush it too much. I don't want to end up like my parents... they were in a situation kinda like this when they were our exact ages (only i was involved with that) and now, 19 years later they hate each other. I made a promise to myself that I would never ever put my kids through what I got put through, as in no painful divorce and at least a hundred court hearings for visitation and whatever else they decided to bring up, so thats why I'm asking opinions about us (me and my boyfriend). I really appreciate this, you have no idea
any other opinions? I'd be glad to here em
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I'm glad to hear that the two of you are financially responsible.
Next step: If possible each of you should live independently (out from under the parental roof) and separately (not with each other) for at least a year.
The most successful married couples would also be successful as two single people.
Good luck. Hold your dominion.
Hello
I'm 19 too, and by no means would I marry someone in the next five years. A teacher once told the class that it's scientifically proven that love lasts at most 3 years because of the whole 'quemistry' thing.
So, if I was in your situation, I would wait a while (maybe a couple of years) before marriage, you could live together before you tie the knot or take Noddy's advice. It's very true what (s)he says about the most succesful couples.
Whatever you choose, good luck!
thanks guys/girls
you're really helping, believe me
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