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Wed 23 Oct, 2002 07:23 pm
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Microsoft Jokes
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we
would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 mi/gal."
Recently General Motors addressed this comment by
releasing the statement: "Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day?"
Not only that, but....
Every time
they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.
Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for
no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
Occasionally, executing a maneuver would cause your car
to stop and fail and you would have to re-install the engine. For some strange reason, you would accept this too.
You
could only have one person in the car at a time, unless you bought "Car95" or "CarNT". But, then you would have to buy more
seats.
Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast, twice as easy to drive,
but would only run on five percent of the roads.
The Macintosh car owners would get expensive Microsoft upgrades to their
cars, which would make their cars run much slower.
The oil, gas and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a
single "general car default" warning light.
New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
The airbag
system would say "are you sure?" before going off.
If you were involved in a crash, you would have no idea what
happened.
If microsoft ever makes a product that doesn't suck, it probably means they started making vacumn cleaners.
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