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Tue 8 Mar, 2016 12:17 am
So I met this girl at a volunteer club last month. We instantly clicked and it was clear she was very interested in me (eye contact, giggling, smiling, asked for my number etc.) She seemed to me she as a very polite and adorable girl. Within two weeks, we went on two dates, she'd reply to my texts instantly, send me cute and flirty texts, and say yes instantly whenever I asked her out.
We got to know each other much better and she even invited me back to her house after our date. As she seemed to me a more reserved type of girl, we didn't have sex, but there was a lot of flirting ie. she let me touch her hair, her hand...etc. To me, it was very clear we were dating and not just "hanging out" as normal friends. I paid for dinner, took her home. etc. (Girls don't usually invite guys to their houses after a dinner date without any romantic intentions right?)
I asked her out a third time, and she said yes right away. I offered to cook at her place this time and she seemed enthusiastic. We were both super busy so didn't text for a few days.
On third date-day morning, after a few light texts she told me that she was no longer single now and that she met a new guy last night. However, she said she was still free to meet me at night but I ended up turning it down as I was shock and honestly upset, though I did not voice this. Just me, or it doesn't make sense for me to cook for her at her place alone, right after she told me she is in a relationship right?
One explanation can be that I'm just a normal friend, but to me I'm definitely not that type of friend and we don't even know each other that well to be friendzoned. I only ever texted her to set up dates and she always seemed like a honest/sincere person. Or maybe I wasn't direct enough I guess, but it seemed to me we were flirting clearly.
Thing is, I have 0 interest being a "side guy". And honestly, my pride is a bit hurt. This was not a girl I was only interested in sleeping with and felt we could have been something more, but maybe I was just naive, as I admittedly don't have too much dating experience.
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If she is in a relationship now, 1. Why would she feel the need to tell me and 2 why would she still be interested in meeting with me one-on-one at her house next day for dinner?
It's been a few days and she hasn't text me since. I will see her tomorrow. Should I cut contact with/ignore her or confront her about it?
She may have meant that she didn't consider your relationship "exclusive" in that she was going to date other guys during this time.
If you want to land this gal, you better step up your game.
@pineapplechicken,
pineapplechicken wrote:1. To me, it was very clear we were dating and not just "hanging out" as normal friends.
2. (Girls don't usually invite guys to their houses after a dinner date without any romantic intentions right?)
3. On third date-day morning, after a few light texts she told me that she was no longer single now and that she met a new guy last night. However, she said she was still free to meet me at night
4. Just me, or it doesn't make sense for me to cook for her at her place alone, right after she told me she is in a relationship right?
5. One explanation can be that I'm just a normal friend, but to me I'm definitely not that type of friend and we don't even know each other that well to be friendzoned.
6. Or maybe I wasn't direct enough I guess, but it seemed to me we were flirting clearly.
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7. If she is in a relationship now, 1. Why would she feel the need to tell me and 2 why would she still be interested in meeting with me one-on-one at her house next day for dinner?
8. It's been a few days and she hasn't text me since. I will see her tomorrow. Should I cut contact with/ignore her or confront her about it?
1. did you discuss this? did you assume it was clear to her?
2. friends have dinner with friends. there doesn't have to be romantic intent/interest
3. it was good of her to clarify things for you
4. why not? if you're not interested in being a friend first, I see no purpose in considering a relationship
5. apparently she didn't agree
6. flirting is not the same thing as heading toward a relationship
7. likely she sensed you were interested in more than friendship. she is interested in friendship
8. why not just talk to her? confrontation isn't good for anyone and it's not a good term to use between friends/possible romantic interests
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finally - 2 dates is not an exclusive relationship. it's still testing things out.
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