Had to share this (from the movie Spellbound)
Constance Petersen: I think the greatest harm done the human race has been done by the poets
Anthony Edwardes: Oh, poets are dull boys, most of them, but not especially fiendish.
Constance Petersen: They keep filling people's heads with delusions about love... writing about it as if it were a symphony orchestra or a flight of angels.
Anthony Edwardes: Which is isn't, eh?
Constance Petersen: Of course not. People fall in love, as they put it, because they respond to a certain hair coloring or vocal tones or mannerisms that remind them of their parents.
Anthony Edwardes: Or... or... sometimes for no reason at all.
Constance Petersen: That's not the point. The point is that people read about love as one thing and experience it as another. Well, they expect kisses to be like lyrical poems and embraces to be like Shakespearean dramas.
Anthony Edwardes: And when they find out differently, then they get sick and have to be analyzed, eh?
Constance Petersen: Yes, very often.
Anthony Edwardes: Professor, you're suffering from "mogo on the gogo"
Constance Petersen: I beg your pardon!
hehehehehehehe
That made me choke on the piece of fluff I was rolling along my lower lip as I read.
I am glad someone brought this up because it interests me very much. I agree that the word "love" gets used to mean a lot of different things. One loves one's spouse, one's girlfriend, parents, siblings, children, friends, ice cream, skiing. Clearly, there are a lot of different feelings being discussed here. For example, how would you define this feeling:
I am an adolescent heterosexual male. Banally speaking, you could say that I am horny. However, I am very reserved about my sexuality, and the vast majority of people I know in real life aren't aware of this. I never act on my arousal except in complete and total privacy, and don't often talk about it, especially with people I know in real life. I am not at all sexually attracted to other males, and although I have a gay friend and am strongly supportive of gay rights, the thought of having sexual contact with a man turns me off.
Recently, I went to an all-boys camp for several weeks. While there, I developed a feeling for one of the kids, we'll call him Matt. If I knew what the male equivalent of "pretty" was, I would say that it described him. He is one year younger than me and nearly a foot shorter, but in no way immature. He is intelligent, funny, and runs fast. I very much enjoyed being with Matt, and followed him around quite a bit. When I realized what I was doing, I started to worry that my behaivor might be creepy, so I asked him if he would like me to leave him alone sometimes. He said that it was not a problem. I asked again a week later, and got the same response.
My camp offers rock climbing trips, and I signed up for one of these, partially because Matt had, although I also do very much enjoy rock climbing. The trip lasted three days, and spent two night at a campground. At the campground, I was in a tent with Matt and one other boy. Each of us had a sleeping bag, and Matt slept between myself the other boy. The second night of the trip, after Matt and the other boy had fallen asleep, I spent a fair amount of time looking at Matt's head which protruded from his sleeping bag. Then, while he was sleeping, I touched his hair.
At the end of camp, when Matt's parents came to pick him up, I hugged him goodbye. I would do so again, and would also touch his hair again if given the chance. I would also hold his hand. However, I would not want to do anything more with Matt, ever. I have reflected on the possibility of being sexually attracted to him, and found that I am not in the slightest. Again, the idea of any sexual contact between us frankly disgusts me, and I have no desire to see down his pants.
This contrasts with the feeling I felt for a female classmate of mine, we'll call her Sarah. Like Matt, I enjoyed being with Sarah, and followed her around. She was extremely reserved because of a traumatic experience which occured before I met her, but had she not been I would have hugged her. I also would have touched her hair, and held her hand. However, unlike Matt, I found that I could become sexually attracted to Sarah, and in a world free from consequenses I might eventually have had intimate contact with her.
I do not claim that either of these feelings is love, but I'd like to know what you think of them, specifically of Matt. I'll post this in a new thread, also, but I thought I'd put it here since the discussion was relevant.
Lord;
I see 'sexuality' as a continuum - heterosexuality is definitely the 'norm' (by that i do not mean 'normal', but the most prominent case) but anyone who considers themself to be that exact 'norm' is truly an 'unusual' individual.
Attraction, and emotional bonding is dependent on many factors beyond sexual lust, and thus freindship can and should occur before the sexual factors 'kick in' and the 'friendship' becomes defined as 'fraternal' or 'sexual'.
As heterosexual males, we all have friends who are 'exceptional', and hold a more personal place in our lives than others; this does not indicate that they are vestiges of latent homosexual tendencies (or that they are not), but simply closer relationships than most.
Culture, is also a factor, as in Mediteranean countries, in general, all relationships are designated in a more tactile, 'hands on' manner, with more hugging and kissing among both men and women, which in more restrained cultures might be seen as unseemly 'sensitive' display.
I do feel (and this will be unpopular) that homosexuality is bigger, in terms of press coverage, and perception than it actually is as a proportion of society; and i hasten to add that, considering the disgusting treatment those
of this group have received in the past, they deserve a period of 'exceptionality'!
I see no reason to 'worry' about your sexual orientation; it is what it is, and life is the challenge of celebrating yourself whatever the parameters.
BoGoWo, I am not worried about my sexual orientation. Your advice is appreciated but unessesary. The first half of your post, speculating on the nature of attraction, is more what I was looking for. Coincidentally, I do agree with you.
Lordregent52 wrote:Banally speaking, you could say that I am horny.
hehehehehehehehehehehehahahahohohohoho
Wow, I'm so glad that no one I know uses this site. So glad.
You never know... I could be your uncle.
Lordregent52 wrote:........speculating on the nature of attraction...........
I recently saw the movie "Troy" which is peopled with a hord of 'pretty' people.
Ignoring the violence which is inherent in entertainment vehicles, and also a very real part of our primitive past (and present), i found feasting my eyes on the beauty of the individuals being displayed in the cinematographers' best chosen light, and the interplay between them as pairs (kudos to the casting experts) was the bulk of the entertainment to be had.
While there is definitely an internal psychological difference in my eye's interpretation of an enchanting female form, and the engaging admiration for the male body under extreme stress, there is a striking awareness of masculine strength in the face of a beautiful woman, and femininity in the face of a pretty man!
Quote:there is a striking awareness of masculine strength in the face of a beautiful woman, and femininity in the face of a pretty man!
I wholeheartedly agree. I suppose then, that finding no alternative we must continue to call men pretty? Of course, I suppose that the only problem with this is that they might possibly take offense, which I doubt anyone here on A2K would.
[Lord; i am reposting my last comment on your 'feeling' thread as i feel it is more 'suitable there, and may draw further interesting comments]
Very insightful comments, BoGoWo.
are we capable of ever hoping to turn IT around ?
Could love be considered a positive energy?
Could anger and hate be considered a negative energy?
Could the electrical impulses flying around our neural networks take on a positive or negative charge based on our overall demeanor?
Could the sum of the average amount of love or happiness of all living creatures create an aura around a planet that is positively or negatively charged?
Could a galaxy where planets are packed in tight because of overall density give reason for individual societies to recognize early in their EVOLution that they are not alone in the universe and find a reason to try to work together and EVOLve into more peaceful societies where the average amount of love and happiness creates more positive energy force?
Could the overall density of planet distribution and solar system distribution among galaxies or the overall density of galaxy distributions in a universe be so small that planets are spread so far apart that societies that develop on those planets are unable to achieve world harmony and in turn develop a aura of negative energy because the sum of all life forms lacks the harmony, peace, happiness, and tranquility to overcome their shortsightedness for the betterment of all species?
Are protons packed denser then electrons ?
What is love? Just ask the boys from Haddaway, who's truly annoying song was used to great effect in the movie 'A Night at the Roxbury'.
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
What is love
Yeah
Oh I don't know
why you're not fair
I give you my love
but you don't care
So what is right
and what is wrong
gimme a sign
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
uoh oh...
Oh I don't know
what can I do
what else can I say
it's up to you
I know we're one
just me and you
I can't go on
What is love ?...
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
uoh oh..
What is love
What is love
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
Don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
I want no other
No other love
This is your life
our time
When we are together
I need you forever
Is it love
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
uoh oh..
What is love
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
What is love ?...
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
Baby don't hurt me
Don't hurt me
no more
what is love?!
extra medium wrote:doglover wrote:It is something that is priceless but can also be bought.
Actually, I think you are right, in a way. We hate to think of love as something that can be bought, but consider:
A very kind, thoughtful, good looking, yet penniless homeless man.
vs.
The same very kind, thoughtful, good looking, wealthy man with several mansions. He never has to work again.
I submit that the rich man will have way more opportunity to find romantic love.
Blasphemy, how dare someone say that! Yes, I know there will be many goldiggers the rich man would need to filter out. But out of the many goldigger types, there just might be a few, maybe one, that would one day grow to love him, even though in the beginning she was in it just for the security, etc. Whereas, this one or two that might one day grow to love, wouldn't even consider hanging around and giving the homeless guy a chance in the first place.
In this respect, can money buy love, sort of?
Or at least increase someone's odds for love? vs. If they are dead broke homeless?
Or perhaps money can help create and maintain the prerequisite minimum conditions necessary for long lasting love. You don't see too many homeless broke people who stay a couple for 50+ years in love.
It can buy love indirectly, or at least act as a catalyst to love.
Re: are we capable of ever hoping to turn IT around ?
nipok wrote:Could love be considered a positive energy?
Could anger and hate be considered a negative energy?
Could the electrical impulses flying around our neural networks take on a positive or negative charge based on our overall demeanor?
Could the sum of the average amount of love or happiness of all living creatures create an aura around a planet that is positively or negatively charged?
Could a galaxy where planets are packed in tight because of overall density give reason for individual societies to recognize early in their EVOLution that they are not alone in the universe and find a reason to try to work together and EVOLve into more peaceful societies where the average amount of love and happiness creates more positive energy force?
Could the overall density of planet distribution and solar system distribution among galaxies or the overall density of galaxy distributions in a universe be so small that planets are spread so far apart that societies that develop on those planets are unable to achieve world harmony and in turn develop a aura of negative energy because the sum of all life forms lacks the harmony, peace, happiness, and tranquility to overcome their shortsightedness for the betterment of all species?
Are protons packed denser then electrons ?
Woah, heavy man. Sounds like bullshit though without scientific evidence to back it up...
I think it is bullshit, agrote; I think that's the point. Coincidentally, though, protons are packed denser than electrons.
oh, nipok was joking?? Whooops...
I don't know, maybe he wasn't. I could be wrong.
Lordregent52 wrote:I don't know, maybe he wasn't. I could be wrong.
No, not joking. Just wondering if love, happiness, joy, peace, etc. could create a positive energy and the reverse could create a negative energy. If so then when we pass, not knowing what happens to the energy contained inside each of us (our soul?) , could this release of energy add or subtract from the overall energy around our planet ?
We may never know or if when we do find out maybe its too late to do anything about it.
ZEN among other philosophies do have some thoughts towards the energy contained inside each of us. If energy has been known to be both positive and negative then whose to say that the aggregate energy inside each of us may not in fact take on a positive or negative charge ???
Bullshit, probably.
Likely to be bullshit, probably.
Proven to be bullshit, (not yet)
