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Tue 2 Feb, 2016 02:54 pm
(Made this post on a different forum, its set back a few days and has updates.) Hi guys. This is a little awkward for me, so cut me some slack please. I'm 16 years old, a Junior in highschool, and this girl that I like (also Junior) asked me to help her with some school work—through instagram DMs. I got her number, and helped her, and she was very grateful. Since then, I'll occasionally text her about school stuff (ex: did we have homework for English? did you study for history?) just random stuff. To thank me for helping her, she bought me candy (after I insisted that she doesn't make a big deal out of it) and wrote a thank you note. The biggest issue I'm having, is knowing whether she is interested in me back. She's fairly popular in my grade, and I'm not very popular. I'm sort of in the middle range—if you will. Not gonna lie, she's very attractive, nice and all that jazz—and again, I'm sort of in the middle range there. Do you guys have any advice? So far, since I got her number, (about a week and a half ago) she hasn't texted me first.I cant tell if she's just being polite and responding, or if she's interested. Can anyone help? Ask any questions you want, I'm glad to take any advice or ideas. Thanks Also, if anyone has any good ideas for conversation starters, those would be gladly appreciated too.
UPDATE: She responded, but said she was "out right now" so she couldnt talk. So idk when to talk to her, without seeming desperate
UPDATE: I sent her something around noon, no response at 8pm
Time of posting: Hasnt responded, didnt talk to me in school (however, I didnt initiate.)
@masterchiefzb,
The only advise I can offer you is, when someone specifically asks for something, in this case " help me with some school work", that is what they are asking for, not a date, not to be chatted up, not to be bombarded with outside text messages (you are not bombarding
you just want too
) .
You have an advantage though, you can be a "friend" and just help her from time to time with school work, leave her alone the other times and who knows further down the track as she gets to know you.
At this stage, she asked for help and honestly sweet, just from what you have written that is all she wanted no strings attached.
@FOUND SOUL,
Thanks. Sucks to hear it though
The only reason I really thought she was interested was because she was being so nice, and wrote a very sincere thank you note.
@masterchiefzb,
Cannot say for sure. She may be interested in you. I suggest that you continue to be her friend and let things happen naturally. At some point she might end up showing interest in you.
Ugh, don't listen to them. If you are interested in her as a girl friend, tell her by saying "Would you like to go for (coffee, soda, ice cream, whatever people in your area do) Saturday afternoon? We can walk down and (do activity) and make a day of it. What do you think?"
She will say yes or no. DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE FRIENDZONED if you are interested in her being your girlfriend. That will only kill you a little bit everyday the rest of your life. Trust me, 15 minutes of her turning you down is MUCH better then a life time of regrets and self doubt.
If she is interested in you, she will go, or give an alternative thing to do. If she is not interested, move on . You can still be acquaintances, but you won't be having a romantic relationship which frees your time up for better purposes.
She asked for help with her school work.
You gave her help with her school work.
She thanked you.
That part of things is over, and the entire 'relationship' may be over from her perspective.
However, you do know that she's at least somewhat comfortable with you (or she wouldn't have approached you for help). so that's a slight/very slight opportunity for you.
Have you suggested getting together after class sometime?
@masterchiefzb,
No love, crushes are cute, gawd we all had them.
She is a sweet girl, stick to those "types", just allow this to be friendship and stick to that, like I said you never ever know where it may go "eventually"
Thanks for the advice everyone. I think at the moment I'm going to go slowly, be friendly, and let her decide if she likes me or not. I have three classes with her and it would be awkward for me to get denied. I dont think asking her to go out somewhere would be a good idea yet, as we barely actually know each other outside of school. And considering I dont get my license 'till March.
@masterchiefzb,
Listen to McGentrix. He is giving you good advice.
@masterchiefzb,
Ever hear the expression, "Don't let them see you sweat?" Relax. she likes you - just back off a bit and wait for her next move.
Unknown what's going on, but it most likely means she is just busy. Don't assume it's bad or that she is backing away. Just let go a bit. you could be in for a big surprise and she may respond to you...but try not to be too anxious.
@masterchiefzb,
masterchiefzb wrote: The biggest issue I'm having, is knowing whether she is interested in me back.
does she know you are interested in her?
@ehBeth,
The only thing to clue her into me being interested in her, is me occasionally texting her, smiling if I see her in the hallways, and occasionally talking to her in class when theres a spare moment.
@masterchiefzb,
Update: she was absent from one of my classes because she left early for something, I asked her if she needed the notes and responded almost instantly that she got them already. I forgot to mention, she uses a lot of exclamation points. Dont know if thats significant
@masterchiefzb,
masterchiefzb wrote: she uses a lot of exclamation points. Dont know if thats significant
nah
'that's a girl thing. there have been studies on that
@masterchiefzb,
well, that says is that you're friendly
she doesn't know you're interested in her
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