Utterly friendless

It's probably not the best of ideas to try to make friends with people who report to you.

Be that as it may, one thing about the 'net is, there's a thing called Meetup.

Look up groups in your area where people do the kinds of leisure time activities you like, whether it's knitting or playing the guitar or cosplaying or whatever. Go. And introduce yourself to the women in the group. In particular, if you see a woman by herself, talk to her! Even it's just to say something like, "Hi, I'm Nicole. I've been crocheting for 12 years and I never seem to meet anyone else who does it. What are you working on?"

Don't just talk to women of your age; talk to older gals, too. Your friendships don't all have to be with people of the same age group as you.

Should you say hi to the guys? Of course. But your mission is to make female friends, so tilt the lion's share of your time, at least in the beginning, to the women in the group.

Interesting, in that I already rather like you (not meant in an icky way, you explain your problem well). I'm an older female who has been major shy, got out of that, had varied friends for years, and I do mean varied, including both men, lovers or not, and women. I had one friend who valued me as a listener, back when I was shy. Figured out after a long while that she was almost all about her. Had sometimes spats with friends for good reason on both sides, and we recovered or didn't; or long term loss of contact because lives for all can get complicated.

True friends, I still have some though we now are miles away, though one nearby. What is in common with them? hard to pinpoint, but I'd say that we'd try to be both honest and listen. 22? some of us were just waking up at 22. Relax. Don't dismiss yourself.

On your post, why people talk over you? I don't know. Do you squeak?
I'm not entirely kidding, as I did know a woman who sort of squeaked, something I'd never heard before. I got to like her. I'd have no way to guess what you might be doing to cause the override except that people are rude often. Consider them not perfect.

I see this from the other side of the coin. I'm someone who on occasion talks over people. Why? I'm an extremely impatient person. I have no patience for bores, people who aren't keeping up with the discussion, people who make irrelevant comments, people who present themselves as authorities when clearly they're not. People who don't listen. People who don't think about what's going on.

In short, I'm a nasty bitch--but lovable. When I was younger, I tried to keep my mouth shut and behave. No more. I act the way I act because I'm me.

Since this isn't a one-time thing, there may be something going on that you're not aware of. Maybe counseling would help. Dunno.

Congrats. You have awareness about what is bugging you. Some people don't have that gotten that far..as they aren't introspective.

FYI, you have two of the best advisers contributing their caring helpful advice. Good for you. See that? You exude a sincere quality that make even people on the Internet like you.

Being in management can be a whole other sort of environment. When you are with other managers, they might feel competitive..or the atmosphere at work is not one that allows closeness with colleagues. Being friends with people are below management might not be a workable goal. Having civil or cordial relationships there might be a more workable goal. That might depend on the work environment and corporate pressures and history.

Suggestions
Here's a possible interpretation and some suggestions. You have some pretty good stuff going on already in your life. You have less friends than you like and clearly that is a concern for you, but have you thought that maybe you have a few good quality friends a situation that many would envy... and you have a b/f

As for the talking-over and assertiveness things...well, that can be overcome. There are some good assertiveness training classes that can help steer you towards a different way of assertiveness - one that is more effective because the way you might come across might be working. I went through as good class and it helped me a lot.

the talking over thing I too have experienced all of my life to some degree...less so now. It was a learned talking style in my family. I had to dial that way back for me at work and with friends circle. Eventually I then learned a new way to avoid reacting to it when other people did it to me. Often times, it's just an awareness issue.

Though, if it happens repeatedly, if they're your friends and continue doing it, you may have to reconsider being around them. A good faith effort should be made to let them know (w/o accusation or blame game) how when they talk over you, how you feel. That can take some time and working with that..in maybe an assertiveness class or counseling.

This can work...but not always. Then it can be time to find a different friend. This all takes time.

In the meanwhile, I would find some hobbies...and activities that interest you, that may or may not involved others. MeetUp is a good resource for interest groups...that people get together in your local area and share their love of dogs, walking, tennis, writing, photography..you name it.

I hope this helps.

Nicole,

You are 22 years of age, men find you attractive, you have a boyfriend, you have 2-3 "girl friends" but not close, you laugh and you are assertive (key word), you joke with people, you are studious and excel in business.

You need to be yourself and love yourself. You don't realise that you are a good looking woman, that the guys hope you ditch your boyfriend for a quick one nighter, that the women fear you as you are assertive as well as excel with work.

Look in the mirror and see what you look like you know you are attractive, look at your credentials and realise that you are good you know you are, look at your boyfriend who as such means there is love there, you know you are loved.

I get it's hard to live in a world where friendships are hard to come by but by you feeling negative about yourself, depressed about the situation, you are putting yourself in the shoes of those you are surrounding yourself with and you are surrounding yourself with these people because you don't see your worth.

When you do, you will make friends with other people that love themselves, believe in themselves, want to succeed in life and love life and all will be fine.

Think about it . You are a threat, as you are good at work and achievements and attractive, see it, understand it and socialise with different like-minded people.

The very best kind of friends for me have been found through hobbies. It's an ideal environment since everyone's primary focus is on the activity, making it easy to manage the personal dynamic.

The hardest friendships are subordinates, because even if you can keep the boundary between business and personal strictly black and white, which IMO is a must, and challenge enough, often the other person can't.

BTW, someone said that you seemed likeable and I agree.