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Very complicated situation

 
 
Reply Wed 6 Jan, 2016 08:44 am
I met my ex two years ago and we hit it off right away. He took me out to really nice restaurants, to the movies, to play pool, to the beach, just about everywhere. I met his buddy and things were going really well for us other than the suspicion i had that he was trying to get me pregnant. Since the very beginning, he never wanted to use protection. He was always saying he likes "creamp__" He is clean (i got tested) but he always came inside me and once when i tested him by saying im pregnant he kissed my stomach. But things started going sour from then, I was cheating on him and he started acting controlling and possessive all of a sudden. He also told me his ex cheated on him with his best friend. I guess I was mostly to blame for that. Then I decided this relationship was not going to work out since it caused us both a lot of hurt and I wanted him to find someone better. I changed my phone number, facebook, and everything. a couple months later, I make a new facebook and he messages me and sends me a friend request asking how I am, and that he wants to be in my life, etc. I tried not to give in but then he started begging me. I was confused because after everything that happened, me cheating on him, then leaving him high and dry, he would find someone else by now and forget about me. So I began thinking about our old memories, I felt emotional, and old feelings started coming back. I gave him my new number and now he messages me every day, asking how I am where I work now and he wants to make sure im good. He says he respects me and everything. but now i am more confused than ever. We always had a great sex life, but now it seems like he wants only that. He asks me to come over daily, and flirts with me to get me to come out with him. He teases and uses sexual talk, mind you we did this before in our relationship but he always used to take me out. Now it seems like he is trying to go "friends with benefits" or something. But that is not what i want. I also get a strong feeling that he got hurt by me in the past and now he doesn't want to try for a relationship again, because he got hurt and caught me talking to another guy on my phone. But why find me on facebook after 8 months? why talk to me daily and talk about everything and about past memories? what is he trying to do here?SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME I am confused to the point of losing my mind, overthinking this situation over and over every single day
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Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 890 • Replies: 4
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CoastalRat
 
  1  
Reply Wed 6 Jan, 2016 12:48 pm
@angela-1991,
Quote:
I was cheating on him and he started acting controlling and possessive all of a sudden
Maybe that had something to do with you cheating on him, ya think?

Quote:
I make a new facebook and he messages me and sends me a friend request asking how I am, and that he wants to be in my life, etc. I tried not to give in but then he started begging me.
You know you could have simply blocked him on FB, right?

Quote:
Then I decided this relationship was not going to work out
This is the only sentence you wrote that matters. YOU decided it was not going to work out and dropped him. What is so confusing about his wanting to get back together, even after 8 months? He still wants a relationship with you of some kind. Does he want friends with benefits? Does he want to get back into a dating relationship? You would need to ask him. But if you already decided the relationship was not going to work out, why would you go back?

Do him a favor and stop taking his calls. Tell him it is over. Unfriend him and block him on FB. Sure, he may be a bit hurt (why, I don't know) but it will be best for him in the long run. And since you decided the relationship was not going to work out, it will be best for you also.
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dalehileman
 
  0  
Reply Wed 6 Jan, 2016 01:05 pm
@angela-1991,
Angie, you might stir more response with a brief summary followed by text separated into paragraphs, pref by carriage returns; usu such followed by short recap or rerun
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capn
 
  1  
Reply Thu 7 Jan, 2016 11:44 pm
@angela-1991,
Feelings never go away they are just shelved. No doubt the guy really loves you to forgo what happened before. Yes he may be trying to play it safe and focus on the sex but trust me you have the power to make him fall head over heels again, you are a woman for crying out loud. Its your feelings for him that matter though, do you really love him?
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Thu 7 Jan, 2016 11:58 pm
@capn,
Urg..

this isn't about love.
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