better idea?

I always liked the pacifier - mainly because when the kids were through with it I just tossed them. It took a few days for them to adjust but they were usually fine after that. Kids are going to get germs from everything because they put everything in their mouth. I don't have a problem with the thumb as far as germs are concerned.

The thumb is a different story as far as attachment is concerned. Most kids either like it or they don't. But if they do - they seem to struggle more with stopping that self soothing they get with it as they get older. If you can get them to stop by a certain age then it really won't affect their teeth. But the longer they go - the more likely they are to develop some issues as the teeth come in.

In my opinion and believe me it is just as a m0m - I would try to get her to switch to the pacifier. I rarely hear of this working once they have started the thumb sucking. But I do think it is worth a try.

she is a teenager i dont know if i put that. and i want something to help her, poor thing doesnt open up to many and is constantly in fear.

oh. No. No pacifier. She is well into the thumb sucking and will have to stop that on her own now that she is a teenager. I am sad to hear she has so much fear though.

A pacifier would only make things worse at this point.

shes had a rough life, i just thought maybe this would help her to a point. but i see where it can be a problem.

I empathize with you. This seems to be a very difficult situation.

Where are her parents or guardian? Aren't her parents your parents? What is your living situation? Why is it she has to email you? What about your schooling and/or work situation? what is your age?

our mother is dead, father travels 5 days a week so she is at different houses. im in college in a different state as i am 24. i have a full time job making 9.50 and hour

I'm curious, about something... how is it you can 'look in' on her at all times?

Bottom line is that you need to find someone..another adult to talk to him...advise him..that he respects that is close to the situation. Who else is in the family that is one of her caretakers?

If he won't listen to you, I don't know how else to advise . You can't take over her legal guardianship without his signing over her parental rights to you. I'll bet he won't have any part of that.

School counselor or church member...priest...etc...also should get involved. Maybe where you sister goes to school.

is there family at any of these houses who would be willing to speak to your father with you?

I wouldn't suggest it - I think this would just encourage the sucking need.

You are a good sister to try to want to help her. Just make sure she regularly washes her hands. Try the small stuffed animal first. She also needs to decide that she wants to quit sucking her thumb.

im a guy.......and i guess that is true just hard

its not family most of our family is really distant......but i could speak to some of them to talk to him

we video chat when we both are up and countless times during the day or when we email......this is how i know so much.......and i do visit home

Then make those arrangements..very soon. Your communication with him..is muddying the waters ..if he is not listening to you as an adult to an adult. Get them involved ASAP.

I think you are insensitive to your lil sister!!!!! what makes you think she would use one anyways?!?!? you may want to talk to her about it and let her know you are concerned instead of posting in public area where many can see and embarrass her! if shes a teen you could treat her like an adult!