Sun 8 Nov, 2015 01:31 am
I'm 27 years old guy. Around a little more than a month ago I managed to find a girl that I liked. I liked her a lot and I wanted this relationship to evolve and I wanted us to be together for a long time..
We were meeting once a week, She said she can't meet more due to extensive studying. she's not calling me often or showing much attention during the week.
After out 8th date, which she seemed distant and tired, and didn't seem to really want to meet before the date (she said, "I will meet you tomorrow If I won't be too tired") , she broke up with me.
After I talked with her on the phone, she told me the reason. That I do not listen to what she says to me and she don't want to say the same thing twice.
So I asked when did it happen? she listed several occasions (but focused on 'A'):
A) She meets me only once a week, so I repeatedly asked her to spend more time with me. She said she can't because she's busy studying. I asked her again, because I thought it's not only that reason alone (girls normally say things which are not 100% and I take this into account - she also commented that it's "early" for her to advance fast), and I really wanted to see her, and that maybe it would've changed. (In response to that she angrily said "But I told you that I only say what I mean" - this irritated me because she essentially said again "You don't listen to what I say")
B) Last date I was pretty horny. But she was on a period and tired. she said "she wants to go to sleep" so I gave up on the sex, but I wanted to put myself to sleep.. I said "I will be able to sleep better if I will come to sexual satisfaction". She said "I understand". So I took her hand and placed it on my **.. I didn't move her hand and touched her body. till I finished and came to sexual satisfaction. She later said she was tired and expected me to let her go to sleep without disturbing her.
C) She said that she once told me that "she didn't want to do something sexual and I stopped. but then I tried it again after a few minutes."
I didn't really understand which occasion did she mean. I can only remember two possible occasions for this.
1) When she stayed the night, I wanted to have an intercourse in the morning as well. But she said "I need to go study". So I told her "I don't want you to go" and attempted to have an intercourse. She didn't resist me and didn't seem to oppose or to object. She seemed neutral about this. But then when we started having the sex she told me she was in pain from the night before, So I stopped.
2) The last date, when she was on a period, I tried to touch her down there, and she said "Perhaps we should not insert fingers, it's nasty down there".. and I stopped. But after a few minutes I did it again and she said - ("But I told you not to touch there"). I immediately stopped and didn't do it again.
In general I also make compromise for her in sex, because she's having pains during intercourse. and I don't continue when she says "stop" due to her pains. In the first time we had sex she even told me when to go in and when to go out of her, because of that. and I did what she wanted. So it turns out basically that I make the compromise and I balance the sex towards her needs. I don't get enough satisfaction from our sex because of it.
Did I do that much to justify breaking up with me without any warning?
I feel completely shattered that she broke up with me this fast.. I thought she would fight over me and that we would be a couple for life. I feel disappointed and disgust towards her.
Did I do something this bad? have I been bad in my attitude?
What should I do now?
She's right. You don't listen to a ******* word she says.
She tells you she's too tired for sex. You put her hand on your cock (rather than just masturbating). She tells you she needs to study. You insist on seeing her more. She tells you she doesn't want to move so quickly. You ignore that and keep pushing.