feeling lost, PLEASE Help !!!

This is the only part of your post that matters.

Take off your blinders and accept what he says on face value. Try to be his friend, instead of striving for something more. Your friendship is going cold because you're not acting like a friend at all - you're acting like someone whose only goal is a relationship.

Which he does not want.

Curb the love talk and find other people to hang out with. Accept that you will be friends with this guy only and find someone else to shower your affection on.

hey jespah,
first, thanx for ur Answer and support.
i'm really doing my best to save the friendship, it may sound like am the only one who is working on that, but he keeps saying '' i don't know what to do''. i woud sucrifice eveything for him even my feelings .
sometimes he gives me such a feeling, that he doesn't wanna see me, but after we talk, he says '' it gets really better after talking about it with u''
He is 5 years younger than me, am 28.
what do u think? how should i approach him now besides meeting friends and help?

Stop thinking in terms of approaching, etc. This is potential boyfriend talk and it's not friend talk.

Friends don't have to be strategized about. You just hang out.

He's probably sensing a heavy vibe from you. And probably also that you're not taking no for an answer.

This is not a good position for you to be in. Please respect this man's boundaries and try to spend some time with people who are not him.

friend zoned bro;;Ok, we’re going to break this down. You might not like what I have to say, but that’s why we have a love/hate relationship. You hate what I say, but you love me ‘cus you know it’s true and I’m trying to save you from pain and misery, which balances out the hatred. Am i right?Walking away when someone isn’t interested in you is one of the toughest things to master. But that’s the thing -the answers you’re seeking aren’t there. You already have the answer, and that answer is no. No further clarification needed.

So, the real challenge is not digging for answers – it’s getting from the big “no” to a place of acceptance.Here’s some tips on how to move on.1. Don’t try to force the issue or convince him. This includes: trying to mold yourself into someone you think he will like, settling for every little ounce of time that he throw your way in hopes that spending time with you will change his mind and most importantly, chasing him down. It’s hard to accept rejection, but it becomes easier when you remember that you want someone to be as crazy about you as you are about them. Right? You want someone to pursue you. Right? So if you stop and just think about what you’re doing, then you’ll realize you are trying for force something that isn’t there. And where will that get you in the end? I know this is hard especially if he didn’t even give you a chance, but still, it’s his choice. The quicker you accept this the quicker you can focus your efforts on finding someone who does reciprocate those feelings.

2. Put yourself in his position and realize that it is his prerogative not to be with you. (I know, where did that superfluous “r” in prerogative come from?) Just as you will not want to date every guy who finds you attractive, the same goes for him. Now what if every guy you turned down kept asking you and texting you and showing up asking for further explanation? You’d probably think one of three things: a) Eew, creepy stalker; or b) What an idiot -why doesn’t he get the point?3. Hope will eat you alive. Hope for World Peace all you want. But when someone rejects you – the hope needs to be buried there. They’ve given their final answer. The door has been slammed shut. The absolute worst thing you can do is try to search for hope among the burning ashes. “Oh, he text me to ask how I was? That means he’s thinking about me – yay! All of my subliminal messages must be working!” No. He’s most likely just trying not to be a complete jerkasaurus since he just rejected you. The answer is still a big, flashing NO. Don’t hold on to hope that in the future he might change his mind. If he does, great. But you hoping will only prevent you from moving on and it will keep you strung out on him, stalking his every move, clinging to his every word.

Walk away with dignity. Because we all know that it’s not personal – it just isn’t the right fit. Oh well. You’ll have several not-so-right-fits until you finally find the one that works. So, in the meantime, acknowledge his prerogative to not be with you, don’t force the issue and relinquish the hope that he might change his mind.

Until you do these things, you won’t be ready and open to finding someone else. And I know you’re thinking that there will never be any one else like this guy. But oh, there will be. And he’ll be so much better. Because he’ll want you back.

I think what's best is that you tell him how you feel and be mature about the answer and what happens, as long as your both mature there will be no issues, everything is hard at first but once you've both Come to terms with it it will be fine

first thank very much for ur detailed post.
i actually have never stalked him or asked him for any explination. i gave him a space and much of a space for him to sort out his thoughts and feelings. he is that kind of a guy, who doesn't talk much and can't express his feelings. As i said in my first Post, i really showed him support and told him that i am there for him, if he needs to talk about it, of course if it's comfortable for him to talk about it with me and clear up his head or anything i could do for him. he said, that he needs some time, actually we both needed some time and space.
i actually stopped texting him as we both used to do so.
NOW he texted me twice this week and came by to my place to see me(he used to come by sundays after coming back from his parents to see me), we haven't seen each other for a weak...again am not saying, there is HOPE or trying to misunderstand him.
we chilled together and talked about uni. stuff and different things, but NO FEELINGS stuff.
then he suggested to visit a friend of ours and he was like '' come let's go visit that friend and chill out with him''
while talking about some random stuff, he was like '' we should plan something for ur Birthday and we r drinking this time together'' . we actually both drink occasionally.

i am doing my best to keep things normal between us, he didn't talk or say anything about it, but i can tell, he is feeling better..

the thing is, i didn't expect him to come by after our last talk and going to a friend then driving me home..that was so sweet from him..
i feel like, he is rushing back to me..how should i deal with this?? since i had feelings for him( i still have, but doing my best to respect his choice..i am not showing that, but deep inside, am still broken).this is not my first concern.

am just worried about his Immidate positive reaktion towards me after, we talked about, how we feel about each other.
i can't explain his reaktion..i know he is trying not to be a jerk after he said NO to me.
but still, i can feel..thereis something in the air, but too early.

what do u think? how could u explain hisimmidate reaktion.
knowing that, he is that kind of a person, who doesn't do a thing, if he is not into it.
this guy is driving me crazy :/

He is a bi friend of yours.

He is not into being your boyfriend.

He's told you that.

Don't keep trying to read more than that into it. He wants to be your friend, not your boyfriend.

If you're not cool with that, you'll have to tell him that you can't be his friend.

Expecting more, hoping for more - it's not fair to either of you.

first thank u for ur comment
i got that, but what he is doing and the way he is acting towards me shows something else.
he is my best friend before i started getting feelings for him.

i don't know dear ehbeth, if u really got my point. we both talked about it and he knows what i HAD for him and i know how he FELT about me. i am not hoping for anything more ..being MY FRIEND is the best gift, i would ever get.

First you should tell about your love to him with open mind .You should stand always with him every time and make interest him on you.I am sure he will find love with you through continuous this type interaction.

First of all i'd like to thank you guys for taking part ofur time answering my posts and helping me out..
i have new updates and i need ur help please..
so my best bi guy friend and i are so much closer now..we actually talked alot in the past few weeks about us and our friendship. one day i was really down and depressed, so he hugged me really tight for about 10 minutes and said '' am here for you, cry if u need to ..everything will be fine..'' later that day he talked about his ''ex girlfriend'' and lost he felt during his 2 week-relationship with her. later we talked about us too and thought about getting more intimate together..i felt how shy and scared he was talking about it..he said '' i really want to try it and with u maybe, but how would it be after that between us..'' he was also afraid of having more pressure of hiding it besides being bisexual. i tried to calm him down and told him, nothing coud change our relationship,wer both mature and we know what we r doing and i am always there for u...he knows how much i love him and how much he means to me. last week on my birthday, he gave me a birthday present, there were also 2 of our best friends and hugged me so tight, then kissed me on my neck, he's kinda took the cance to kiss me without being noticed by others. i wanted to kiss him back, but i couldn't. he did it so gentle and quick. i really wanted to kiss him, but at that moment everyone was there..we went for a drink with his brother and another friend of ours.
after the party, he came over with his brother to my place..we chilled, spent amazing time together, but nothing happend. as he wanted to leave, we hugged eaach other so tight and he kissed me again on my neck. OH God at that moment his brother came in to the room and i couldn't kiss him back again.
the thing is, i don't wanna rush it..so quickly, cos i know, he is abit afraid..i don't want to make him uncomfortable about it..what should i do..can i kiss him the same way or tke it to the next level? please help