If you pretend that everything is WONDERFUL, you might start to really believe it.
If you are fed up with work, try the wonderful hilarity of RETIREMENT.
Retirement means you never have to call in SICK again.
It is never easy to distinguish between a SCOTSMAN in a good mood and a sick cat.
Scotsmen and their kilts are like WWF fighters; make fun of them, and you'll find yourself in a world of PAIN.
A FRIEND in need can be a real pain in the neck.
(ain't dat de troof!)
A cheerful friend is like a little RAY of sunshine.
A ray of hope can NEVER replace a good flashlight.
Never seek to know what goes on in the SEWERS, you wouldn't like it.
The sewers of our minds sometimes belch up CREATIVE ideas.
People with Creative Writing degrees are very often the sort of AUTHORS you don't want to read.
Authors need HUMOR to avoid sounding self-important.
Humor is the oil on the PISTONS of life's limo.
A woman who DRIVES a Lamborghini is a pistons-packing momma.
A dripping tap drives you to DISTRACTION.
When BORED, any distraction is often welcome.
Bored housewives are easy to BED.
A soft bed, a good BOOK, and a glass of great wine, help one drift happily off to dreamland.
It's a stupid person who thinks the ANSWERS for life's questions can be found inside a book.
If you know all the answers, you haven't been asking the right QUESTIONS.
(hey that's rather good)
