Women proposing to men

um not in the near future, but it is becomming or is common place for couples to deside together. If you reall think about it that is what happens man and woman are in love and they arrive at a place where they want to get married they both make a desision and that is how it sould be in a marriage. Two people making desisions together.

Is it weird?
Seems almost commonplace among the younger women (under 30) where I work. Some of them even design engagement rings for the guys to wear.

I don't think it's been "weird" for a woman to make the first move in any relationship situation for decades! I'm 45 and asked guys out in college back in the paleolithic age. They were surprised, but they liked it. I think it took off some of the pressure for them.

Also, my husband and I discussed marriage. He didn't "ask" me. We talked about it together and decided between us that it was a great idea. You mean like in the days where a guy asked the woman's parents for her hand in marriage?

It's much more complicated than that now. Now we have combined incomes, usually two different places of residence coming into the equasion, whether to have children or not, kids from past relationships, etc., etc., etc. It's not a simple, cut and dry world anymore.

I have a friend who is my age who still won't phone a guy she's interested in. She's been sitting around for 3 years waiting for one particular guy she likes to call her because she thinks it's inappropriate for a woman to make the first move. I have a feeling she's in for a long lonely life. It's like "Geez, speak up, woman! He's not a mind reader!"

Did something happen or did someone say something to you recently to make you think it's socially unacceptable for a woman to discuss marriage with a potential husband?

We all have to make our needs, ideas, wishes known and discuss them. That's the only way to make our lives as uncomplicated as possible in a very complex world, not to mention saving a lot of aggravation and wasted time for women, sitting around hoping someone "asks" them.

I think it's way cool for a woman to ask a guy out, and even propose. It shows a ton of confidence, and a lack of being fettered to outdated concepts. Sheesh, the last thing I want in my life is a girly-girl sitting around waiting for things to fall into place like they do in fairy tales. Thankfully, my wife isn't like that.

Oh, I should add, it's true, guys are clueless. Speak up ladies.

Cav, as usual, I entirely agree with your point...in this case, more than most.

Men aren't good at reading the "signals" that women supposedly give them - or will deliberately ignore them because of the scary decisions/implications that ensue.

Any woman in a long term relationship who isn't prepared to ask "is this going to end in marriage" (if that element is important to her) to her man is setting off on the wrong footing for a life together. Mutual respect and shared decision making have to be part of that.

KP