So, after hanging around the drug store for ages looking terrified, our subject, a man in his late fifties, cautiously approached the pharmacist, and quietly asked if there was anything available for curing erectile difficulties.
The pharmacist, said "there are a number of competing medications on the market, have you tried Viagra?"
The addled man looked marginally heartened, and asked
"can i get it 'over the counter'?"
The pharmacist grinned, and said
"you'll need a very large dose for that!"