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Mon 30 Mar, 2015 05:57 am
Hi there. I am 30 and live with my boyfriend for 5 years, together for 6.
We are happy together, I adore him and we have spoken about marriage. He is much a part of my family as I am his.
Last year whilst working I met someone who I later ended up chatting with by text, initially innocently and then flirting and we have kissed on two separarate occasions. This person is also in a relationship and I get the feeling that he cheats often, whereas i do not!
At that the time that this took place, I was feeling a little like I wanted one last experience of being single. My boyfriend is older than me and I had met him when i was 24, not expecting that it would turn into a deep love. I know this is inexcusable, but after analyzing it in my head I think I just wanted a last experience of how it could be to be single i guess.
I have never in my life cheated before and have not done since.
To cut a long story short, I totally regret what I have done and it was so unlike me that I considered it an out of body experience almost (I am aware that this sounds silly). This man occasionally writes to me in a flirty way, but i made it clear last year that I want to concentrate on my relationship.
I know that i will see this man this year due to work and will be in a situation where I will be with other collegues who know my boyfriend. It is extremely unlikely that anything will be said, but it is making me nervous.
I am in no doubt that if i said anything to my boyfriend that I would lose him. 100%. Our relationship would be over and I can't imagine anything I would hate more.
I would like to know how to tackle this upcoming situation whilst being as professional, friendly (If i was cold it would be very odd, i work in a quite informal environment). Any feedback would be much appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
"A kiss is just a kiss . .."
Forget it. In fact, when you see him, act like you hardly know him. Stay away from him.
PS - how long have you been with this BF? How old is he?
At 30, you could be JUST NOW be looking for Mr. Right, IMO.
@PUNKEY,
My boyfriend is 37.
I honestly had put it aside in my head for a long time, it's only now that the time of this meeting approaches that i feel so nervous.
I am quite nervous by nature ... :-/
@InMyHead,
Treat it like a JOKE!
A silly lapse of judgement on your part.
Decide you are not going to talk or make eye contact with him. Stay around groups of people. Don't get alone with him. If that does happen, don't let him bring it up. ("Oh let's not talk about that. That was nothing, a silly thing. How's your sales been?")
@PUNKEY,
Unfortunately I have to speak to him alot! I don't know this guy well enough to not do a crazy and decide to just tell someone. However i'm pretty sure this is my paranoia in overdrive as don't see what he would gain by destroying my personal life. The fact of the matter is that i did emotionally cheat as well as these kisses, very flirty too over a few months. I think I will just be friendly but if the conversation goes there, I will just say that me and boyfriend are super strong now and I want to concentrate on that. What do you think? Thanks for speaking with me :-)
@Frank Apisa,
Thanks for your replies Frank.
I thought that's what I did - it's intimate in my country too.
"In this country, "I kissed him" has an alternate, much more intimate connotation."
REALLY? Do explain to this mid-west raised woman . . .
@Frank Apisa,
If someone said, "I kissed
it", perhaps.
@Frank Apisa,
It was two very passionate kisses - but just that - not any other type of "kisses" !
@Frank Apisa,
That is SO not a common Americanism.
I'm with Ragman. "I kissed it." would connote that, sure.
Either way, off-topic, per the OP.
@Ragman,
Ragman wrote:
If someone said, "I kissed it", perhaps.
I'm with you, I've never heard anyone use Kissed to mean oral sex. Unless it's become another word hijacked for sexual activity, but it doesn't sound kosher to me.
I almost forgot, welcome to A2K.
'What do mid-west raised women who do not like to use blow-job use?'
"I've got a Headache"
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