Please correct this for me....

I'll try to point out a few of the obvious errors, without getting into niceties about content:

The strongest attribute in my life, as the point of my view, is that my (omit "my"and add "I") I never giving (gave) up (my) personality. During my undergraduate time I had to face the most challenging period of my life. Since (because)my parents were (had) undergone some serious surgeries. As the eldest daughter of the family I had to took (take) care of them, (period .) sometimes I thought about giving up my studies, then again it came to my mind whatever the end result there is a responsibility on my shoulders which is making my parents proud and for that I have to continue my studies even if it take my whole life.(break up into more than one sentence) Because of that I kept saying to myself that whatever the end results might be, I have to finish my bachelor’s degree. I gave my full strength to it. Even though the results was (were) not what I expected I completed it . of course I am proud of myself. Because the undergraduate course I underwent is well known for (being the) most difficult bachelor’s degree program in my country and I am proud of myself since I got through it. If the time was good (had been better) for me I know that I might have achieved even a first class result. Even though when (omit "when") most of my friends (were) giving up the degree I got through it even (though) I had to study in a hospital room beside my mother or father’s bed.

Looks good, layman, and a belated welcome to the forum.

Thanks, Roger. I've been here for about a month, but I think you are the only one who has "welcomed" me. Not that I'm complaining about that, but it's a friendly gesture on your part.

woaaaaaaaaaah... thank you soooooooooo sooooooooo much... I'll correct it right away and post the next part when it's ready. Thanks again and again and agaaaaaaaaaaain...

Perhaps she means her "never-give-up" personality.

Welcome Layman. I thought you were an oldster here

Punkey, if you thought that, then you must be new yourself, so let me welcome you, too.

You're quite welcome, Mani.

I think that my strongest attribute is my enduring determination to succeed. During my undergraduate education I was forced to face the heretofore most challenging period of my life. My parents underwent some serious surgeries. As the eldest daughter of the family I needed to take care of them. Sometimes I thought about giving up my studies. At those times it occurred to me that it was very important to make my parents proud by continuing my education, even if it required a longer time. I reminded myself that whatever the end results might be, I must finish my bachelor's degree. I put a lot of effort into my college education. That effort has not yet yielded the results I expected. I am proud of my accomplishment regardless. The undergraduate program that I attended is well known for being one of the most difficult bachelor's degree programs in my country. I do not in any way regret my investment in my education, in the long run it will be beneficial to me regardless of its monetary costs or gains. Many of my friends ended up dropping out of the degree. I toughed it out even through the difficult times when I had to study next to parent's beds in hospital rooms.

You went the extra mile (which I didn't want to do). Partly because I think it's better that Mani learn from his/her own elementary grammar mistakes.

Forgive me for being pedantic, but I would probably say "theretofore" instead of "heretofore" (truth be told, I probably wouldn't say either, but that's just me).

Thank you soooo sooo much ...errrrrm (how should I pronounce your name ? ) anyway... thanks again and again for helping me out and it's really beautiful

it's ok, Layman, I know that I'm really clumsy when it's come to writing , and thanks again for supporting me

Yeah, I think he did a good job of "polishing up" what you seem to be expressing.

I also believe it might be better for her to work more towards it on her own. However, it appears to be an entrance essay to upper division schooling. It is likely time dependent. If she cannot enter the schooling, how can she continue to learn and practice effectively? Furthermore, having worked on learning a new language myself, I found it extremely helpful to have native speakers correct my clumsy attempts. Often times ideas are so difficult to clearly express in an unfamiliar language, often due to cultural differences and thought patterns. Native speaker's careful corrections taught me some of the mistakes in my grammar. Often they also taught me new vocabulary. Heretofore, as it is used in this case, effectively means "up to this point." The word therefore is not an appropriate substitution in this case.

Yeah, I see what you mean there.



No, it wouldn't be, if that's what you're trying to say. Since it was past tense, I was just leaving open the possibility that something even more challenging might have come along since that time.

Good point. Language is so much about intent. I have the unfortunate viewpoint of thinking that there is almost always something more difficult ahead! Not that that is always a bad thing...