There's a divorce industry in this country. It is guaranteed to gind ones soul out if one or the other cannot come to agreement with the injured/and/or/more monied partner. I think some lawyers try to make thing more lucrative and traditionally divorces have been winner take all.
Fortunately for me there was no disagreement between us other than her wanting to suddenly end a 15 year marriage. She thought the girls would want to live with her and she had taken them into her plans and neither girl let it slip for five until she told me. Within six months it was finalized. I didn't ask for child support and because she had a great job in state law enforcement, she provided health insurance.
Getting a lawyer would have put custody into the air. I went along very unhappily with the inevitable.
My girls graduated high school 3.8 and graduated collage Summa Cum Laude. One a working archeologist going back for her PhD, and the other working in education with husband two children.
Life didn't go the way it was supposed to, but it went very well anyways. Life is good, I am retired young and working whatever I feel like, I teach batik and painting, have a dye shop. Life is very good.