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In a relationship with a separated father

 
 
Reply Mon 5 Jan, 2015 08:59 am
I don't know why I am in such a pain after the man I'm in a relationship with confessed he had been married and he had a daughter. Since he told me that in my eyes he is not my man anymore. I love him a lot but his past is so heavy for me that I can't stop thinking that bother woman has been so important for him to choose to merry her and have a child with her. I'm even jealous of the child which is really immature because I think that although he can cease to be a husband he can't stop to be a father and I cannot be ever the most important woman in his life. Please help me relieve my pain ..... I love him so much that thinking to break up with him would devastate me. I know he loves me but he should have probably told me that at the beginning of our relationship . Our relationship started 1 year ago and it was really fragile at the beginning now we have started to live together so I think that probably he trusted me enough to confess his secret ..... Help xxxc
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Type: Discussion • Score: 2 • Views: 769 • Replies: 7
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PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Mon 5 Jan, 2015 09:05 am
If he is not DIVORCED, then he is still married!

Yes, he was afraid to tell you. Most women would not even have given him the light of day until he was SINGLE.

INSIST that he get a divorce.
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Little Leo
 
  1  
Reply Mon 5 Jan, 2015 09:14 am
@Little Leo,
He is getting a divorce and it should be completed in a couple of months
jespah
 
  2  
Reply Mon 5 Jan, 2015 09:16 am
@Little Leo,
Then wait until that's done before going forward.
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PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Mon 5 Jan, 2015 09:20 am
This man has too much "baggage" that you can't handle.

Break it off and find yourself a single man, with no children and no ex-wife.
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ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Mon 5 Jan, 2015 10:54 am
@Little Leo,
Little Leo wrote:
he should have probably told me that at the beginning of our relationship . Our relationship started 1 year ago and it was really fragile at the beginning now we have started to live together so I think that probably he trusted me enough to confess his secret ..... Help xxxc


he should definitely have told you that he is married before you started living together

has he explained to you why he didn't tell you earlier?

have you met his wife and daughter? you will have to have a relationship with both of them
Little Leo
 
  1  
Reply Tue 6 Jan, 2015 06:23 am
@ehBeth,
He did .... He said that he was scared of my reaction and no moments seemed the right one . He doesn't have a relationship with his ex wife he doesn't t talk to her anymore .... He can see his child through Skype not all the time when she wants that. Of course I'm hoping that he is going to have s relationship with his child and of course this will happens with his ex wife too ..... I have to overcome my jealousy of his past but for now I feel a lot of pain
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PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Tue 6 Jan, 2015 09:16 am
HE had to trust YOU enough to tell the truth?

You better have a sitdown with this guy and discuss his financial obligations, his past and anything else he is not telling you, like are there any more kids? Is he paying child support? Why the delay in getting the actual legal divorce if he never sees her? Do they own property together?



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