I have found the perfect woman, and I possess no confidence

Reply Wed 31 Dec, 2014 01:22 am
I work with a small art studio my city. I'm just the plain typical artist with not many pieces to sell, so not very eventful until recently. So... there's a lovely girl who has been working on some pieces with me, she's been here about as long as I have been, a few months, but I've only been talking and painting with her around for about two or month months. She says she's usually a coffee runner and doesn't really paint often (she has the prime definition of artists block), and this is the first time shes stayed in a studio to work and not in a cramped little apartment alone. It's surprising she's not famous, for her art is absolutely gorgeous, better than pretty much most artists. The work is usually scattered across her desk in unorganized heaps, or torn into the smallest of scraps and thrown into the aluminium trash can. I don't know why she throws it all out. One day, they'll cost a fortune. And she always wastes her ideas. She could create the most amazing storylines in the world (she's an aspiring comic book artist who wants to work for Marvel), she'll come up with them all the time, but she always shuts them down and never brings them to someone who could help her on her way. Her name is Carina. She's the most incredible person I've ever met, and the time I spend doing pieces alongside her are pure bliss. To say I have a crush is the understatement of the century. You'd hang on her every word, and remain completely hypnotized by her looks, brains, and braun. She's adorable and sexy, courageous and shy, she's her own yin and yang. It's confusing.
Her hair is like rich melted chocolate, falling in waves down her back and across her shoulders, cascading over her breasts. Those eyes of hers are dark green discs with the darkest of brown rimming her pupil, a perfect hazel, and they always seem to be framed by her eyebrows that she admits to spend more time than she should on. And when she's not looking at me, I stare at her full Italian lips for minutes on end, fantasizing about what they would feel and taste like on my own, very distracting from my work. She's funny, beautiful, sweet, just all around perfect. I want her to just go out with me once. Once is all I need. One dinner, one kiss. It would be bliss. I'd swear I'd be blessed if I got more. Please help! I've never been in a relationship, I'm 23, I'm extremely shy.
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Reply Wed 31 Dec, 2014 06:20 am
I'd say, just ask her on a date and be yourself. You both seem to have similar interests. And... There is no such thing as a perfect woman or perfect man.... We all have flaws and weaknesses. You are in an infatuation cloud, so dont try to ideAlize her, but actually get to know her as you move along in dating.
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Reply Wed 31 Dec, 2014 08:45 am
Ask her for coffee.

It's not like you don't know her at all (we get plenty of people on here who have enormous crushes on folks where they don't even know the person's name).

It's coffee. It's not a marriage proposal. So ask! And any of the following will happen:
  1. She says yes, you have a lovely time, you ask her on a date and she agrees. YES! Please name your first child after me, regardless of gender. Wink
  2. She says yes and you have a lovely time, but when you ask her on a date, she tells you she has a boyfriend (or girlfriend), or refuses a date for any other reason or even no reason. Ah, well. But you spent time together and you did something to overcome your shyness a bit. Good job.
  3. She says yes and you have a lovely time, but you fail to close the deal and ask for a date. You remain in limbo - but since you've made a move you get some confidence and are eventually able to make a more daring move. Not the most ideal scenario but at least you did something. But you really need to close the deal. Half-credit for this one.
  4. She says no for whatever reason, and it's not a scheduling issue. She might tell you she has a boyfriend or girlfriend (and can see where this is going), or that she doesn't think it's right to date someone she essentially works with, or even that she doesn't find you attractive that way. Not the best situation in the world, but at least you tried, and you know where you stand. Every bit of daring and going outside yourself and trying new things helps increase confidence and decrease shyness. Good on you for trying.
  5. You do nothing and never know that you could have potentially had something, and you remain in your shyness bubble forever. Bad move.

Now, which one do you want to be doing?
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