Obstinacy is a hard nut to crack. You can take a horse to water, but....let them stew in their own juice, say I. A good mix of metaphors never did anyone any harm.
Harm has been done to my reputation by those ridiculous rumors that I am a serial killer. I feel like killing those slanderers.
Slanderers are villainous people. They should check their facts.
Facts have determined that one in every six people prefers scuba diving to bee keeping. Honey may soon go the way of all flesh.
Flesh is the main substance of England's most popular newspapers. What sad voyeurism.
Voyeurism might be the only means of connecting to others, for the truly isolated.
Isolated incidences of paranoia often restrict the extent of voyeurism. Not that I'd know of course.
Course rules must be followed if you play golf. You have to wait your turn to tee off.
Off-colour today. Think I'll spend the day in my pyjamas.
Pyjamas are a great way to spend the day! I've been known to have a few of those days myself.
Myself is the first person I have to satisfy. Everyone else can wait their turn.
Myself is a favourite subject of mine. I wish I had more pyjama days.
Turn aside. I'm coming through whether you're ready or not.
Not without a fight will I surrender my Godiva truffles.
Truffles ahoy, they shall be mine! I challenge you to a duel!
Duel away, you two. Then I shall have the truffles -Ha-HA!
HA! Caught you in the act, now you too shall feel the sting of my blade!
Yes, but I die with a smile of chocolate on my face!
Face the eternal torment of the chocolate thief! Thou dastardly villain!
Ah! But I go to a better place; a place full of chocolate, where you never get fat!...
