I have the makings of a run-on sentence I'd like checked please.

There's a lot wrong with this sentence.

Breaking a sentence apart implies that the halves (or even thirds) would themselves create individual standalone sentences. But that's just not the case here. After the word "citizens", is it a complete thought? Think about that. Oh, and clip the n at the end of the word "American" while you're at it. The n at the end makes it an adjective, and it's currently not modifying anything.

This isn't everything that's an issue - the wording is rather archaic, for one thing, but let's start with the 2 issues I've outlined above. Now, what else do you see?

Aside from the "n" Dave, I can't see anything terribly wrong with it

From a purely technical point of view tho, the "so long" suggests an oncoming comparison that isn't executed. No doubt one of our techies can elaborate