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Is it okay to date a guy that is 23 when I am 15

 
 
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 05:44 pm
I am 15 and this guy is 23 we have been hangin out as friends but I would like to start dating and I think he does to but some one is sAying if we don't stop hanging out they are gonna call the cops but my mom does not care if I date or hang out with him so is it legal?
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Type: Question • Score: 23 • Views: 5,219 • Replies: 70

 
neologist
 
  4  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:09 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Is it OK?
NO
Hotpinkbug
 
  2  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:25 pm
@neologist,
I don't see why not tho we are not planing on having sex I turn 16 in 9 months and then it is legal to have sex and everything.
chai2
 
  3  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:41 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Hotpinkbug wrote:

I don't see why not tho we are not planing on having sex I turn 16 in 9 months and then it is legal to have sex and everything.


You've already made up your mind, so why are you bothering to ask?

BTW, your mother will be ok with it, until she isn't.

She could, years from now, have him arrested to having had sex with an underage girl. Don't say that couldn't possibly happen.
0 Replies
 
bobsal u1553115
 
  5  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:51 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
NO and under NO circumstances!!!! Not just no, but HELL NO!.
chai2
 
  4  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 06:55 pm
@bobsal u1553115,
Plus this 23 year old man has got to be a dumb **** for taking such a risk.

16 will get you 20 you know.
neologist
 
  8  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:04 pm
8 year difference is no big deal if he's 33 and you're 25
But if he's 23 and you're 15, he's a h-h-horny toad.*

*Apologies to Jespah Very Happy
ehBeth
 
  4  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:06 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
What your mother thinks about this is irrelevant to the legality as well as to the common sense of the young man.

Why someone who is 23 is hanging around with teenagers is a question someone in your home community needs to consider.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  3  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:10 pm
@neologist,
I was trying to figure out what to say other than "no, no, a thousand times no".
There are reasons - power differential if not maturity difference or brain smarts differential. But I'll go with the toad explanation.

This isn't to say that it isn't common for fifteen year old girls to like older men, in terms of having a crush on someone. But, a relationship, no. Bad move.
0 Replies
 
bobsal u1553115
 
  3  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:12 pm
@chai2,
He's more venial than dumb. He needs arresting if he's encouraged her in any way. There's something seriously wrong with him and Pink needs to talk to someone like a pastor or Councillor right away.
0 Replies
 
cherrie
 
  5  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:37 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Hotpinkbug wrote:

I turn 16 in 9 months


So three months ago you were only 14. You're just a child. Does he know how old you are, or more to the point - how young you are?

If he does then there is something wrong with him to be wanting a relationship with someone so much younger than himself.

If he doesn't know then I suggest you tell him as soon as possible. If he's got any sense he will end it now.
chai2
 
  4  
Reply Sat 2 Aug, 2014 07:48 pm
@cherrie,
cherrie wrote:

[
So three months ago you were only 14.


Ha!!

I hadn't thought of it that way cherrie.

True, she's closer to 14 than 16.
0 Replies
 
Germlat
 
  4  
Reply Sun 3 Aug, 2014 07:50 am
@Hotpinkbug,
Would you hold hands and hang out with a 9 or 10 year-old boy? Why or why not? Think about that. Would you think it's not right? Same thing with this man you're hanging out with.
bobsal u1553115
 
  2  
Reply Sun 3 Aug, 2014 08:18 am
@Germlat,
Good example. Wish I'd a thought of it.
0 Replies
 
FBM
 
  1  
Reply Sun 3 Aug, 2014 10:10 pm
@Hotpinkbug,
Hotpinkbug wrote:

I don't see why not tho we are not planing on having sex I turn 16 in 9 months and then it is legal to have sex and everything.


If you're sure that 16 is the legal age of consent where you are, then I would say that after your next birthday, you won't have to care what anybody else thinks. Please be safe.
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Mon 4 Aug, 2014 08:38 am
@FBM,
Yes, AFTER she's 16. She's got 9 months to go. That's the problem.

Do you remember how hard it is for a 15 year old to wait 9 whole months?
maxdancona
 
  2  
Reply Mon 4 Aug, 2014 08:43 am
@chai2,
The reason we have an age of consent is because as kids get older they get smarter and more mature. Maybe in 9 months she will grow up enough to know that this is a not a good relationship for her to be in.

I hope it is enough time.
0 Replies
 
gungasnake
 
  2  
Reply Mon 4 Aug, 2014 09:03 am
@Hotpinkbug,
Quote:
Is it okay to date a guy that is 23 when I am 15


Not OK, not smart, and not even legal. The outside limit on age difference for teenagers has to be about two years and part of that's because you don't have any real way of knowing anything about somebody four or five years older than you are. Major horror stories like that of Karla Homolka often arise from girls dating men who they don't really have a way to know anything about.
0 Replies
 
gungasnake
 
  2  
Reply Mon 4 Aug, 2014 09:06 am
@Hotpinkbug,
I mean, all you really know about this guy is that he's interested in dating underage girls at age 23....
0 Replies
 
FBM
 
  1  
Reply Mon 4 Aug, 2014 09:18 pm
@chai2,
chai2 wrote:

Yes, AFTER she's 16. She's got 9 months to go. That's the problem.

Do you remember how hard it is for a 15 year old to wait 9 whole months?


True, but it takes two to tango. Anyway, dating =/= boinking. Trust me, I have many sad years of experience on this. Wink
 

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