Okay...I will be the one who asks...

@Frank Apisa,

FWIW, his last post was occurred on July 8th. And, being that it's summertime and some people do take a holiday, ..and even Pubs close in UK...some people are forced to go out and away. Maybe he's actually found a life beyond pubs and posting **** on A2k.

Hell, maybe I'll try that, too?!

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Spendi and I snot routinely.

Don't tell me he is ill, I'll have to kill him.

Meantime, come over here, love bug.

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@Frank Apisa,

You have a need to know? Do you have the correct security classification? I would guess you are cleared for "gossip over the clothes line."

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@Foofie,

Personally, I commend and respect Frank for his concern for a member in the A2K community who may not be everyone's darling.

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@Ragman,

What? Spendi's British? I was sure he was a Mongol.

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@JLNobody,

Maybe...as he is far too dis-Oriented.

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Don't tell him I said this, but his absence leaves a hole. Of course, his presence does the same. Bada Bing.

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Aha...so nobody has heard from him.

Well, I am sure we all hope he is well...and that the absence is more a result of a vacation than of any illness. Let's hope he shows up soon.

Just gotta remind everyone that there should be someone who can notify the community if anything serious happens. It would be bad enough to lose a fellow A2Ker...but to not know for sure would be truly bad.

Nancy knows about A2K...and knows some of the A2Kers...so notifying if something serious happens to me will be no big deal.

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@Frank Apisa,

While your concern is good and all and placing a thread inquiring as to where he might be is touching, I'd prefer it left at that. If he is lo n a sabbatical then he may return. If health issues have arrived, he may return. If he has had a fit of rage against a member here or many members, well, he may return.

OOr may have left us forever, by choice and may even be monitoring this thread to find out if anybody cares.

Hopefully whatever is going on isn't dreadful. Beyond that it is his decision to inform or not.

THAT, Frank is the other thing

You want all of us to have a Contact or a few contacts who will come here and say what is occurring.

For me at least, that is not happening. Several times I have exited for (mostly) health matters. I value my privacy and do not give information to friends and family about my Internet interactions. A few over the years have been told by me that I'm on this site; however, they don't know much beyond that. I'd like to keep it that way. Haven't offered up my personal contacts to anybody here either or given their info to any member here. No plan to do so. When the time comes, if this place is still operating, I will "disappear". You can then all use your imaginations to figure what happened. If alive and able to communicate I will likely do so. Other than that, it van remain a mystery. There are a few here who know my full name and so if an obituary were written for a paper, and it was Internet available then you might find out.

Life needs mystery to become it's most exciting and thought provoking. That may in the end be my legacy. I can live (and even die) with that.

Each of us is allowed to make our own decisions, that hopefully will never change.

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@Sturgis,

Sturgis wrote:

Each of us is allowed to make our own decisions, that hopefully will never change.

In my opinion, anything deviating from your wisdom above might be motivated by intrusiveness based on the belief that it is objectively correct to be intrusive in the name of caring. And, who does that "caring" reflect on? The person "caring" naturally, so in my opinion again, the "caring" instrusiveness might be just so much "self-serving" behavior.

I wonder if Yenta the Matchmaker thought she was caring?

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Closure. Got to have it, in any case.

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@Frank Apisa,

I was just about to ask about spendi in the Lost & Misplaced A2K Members thread when I spotted this one. He's always posted very regularly in the Acronym thread, as far back as I can remember, so his absence in there has been very noticeable, and I was feeling concerned about him. I'm still concerned about him. I just sent him a PM.

I think that whether people want to have someone else contact A2K about their sudden absence, particularly one due to a serious health problem, or life crisis, or even their demise, is entirely up to them. There are all sorts of reasons they might not want to do that, it's a very individual thing.

I certainly do hope spendius is all right. I hope he'll be back here soon so I can leave him "Y" words, just so I can aggravate him, although he's rather proficient at handling them.

Maybe we could use a Not Missing thread, where people could post that they won't be around for a while, or even that they are leaving A2K, without having to give any explanations or details if they choose not to, and preferably wouldn't elaborate much, and just use that thread to post a notification so others wouldn't worry unnecessarily.

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@Sturgis,

Sturgis wrote:

While your concern is good and all and placing a thread inquiring as to where he might be is touching, I'd prefer it left at that. If he is lo n a sabbatical then he may return. If health issues have arrived, he may return. If he has had a fit of rage against a member here or many members, well, he may return.

OOr may have left us forever, by choice and may even be monitoring this thread to find out if anybody cares.

Hopefully whatever is going on isn't dreadful. Beyond that it is his decision to inform or not.

THAT, Frank is the other thing

You want all of us to have a Contact or a few contacts who will come here and say what is occurring.

For me at least, that is not happening. Several times I have exited for (mostly) health matters. I value my privacy and do not give information to friends and family about my Internet interactions. A few over the years have been told by me that I'm on this site; however, they don't know much beyond that. I'd like to keep it that way. Haven't offered up my personal contacts to anybody here either or given their info to any member here. No plan to do so. When the time comes, if this place is still operating, I will "disappear". You can then all use your imaginations to figure what happened. If alive and able to communicate I will likely do so. Other than that, it van remain a mystery. There are a few here who know my full name and so if an obituary were written for a paper, and it was Internet available then you might find out.

Life needs mystery to become it's most exciting and thought provoking. That may in the end be my legacy. I can live (and even die) with that.

Each of us is allowed to make our own decisions, that hopefully will never change.

Thank you for sharing that, Sturgis. If you disappear...I will not question it.

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Interesting... Also, a nice thought. A2K wants to know if I die. I like it.

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@snood,

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@snood,

Actually, I'd rather have A2K folks imagining me gabbing away, enjoying humor and good food, and even passionately arguing a bit, if I suddenly vanish from here. I prefer not to be thought of as dead, just off doing the same old thing somewhere else. And, for the few folks here who'd probably like to see me gone, I refuse to give them the satisfaction of knowing I'm dead--let them live with the awful possibility I might show up here again. Laughing

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I sincerely hope that those of you who would rather not have people know if an unexplained absence is caused by serious health problems...or even death...

...get your wish.

Vanish, if you will, and leave us in the dark about the fact that you are seriously ill or dead.

No problem.

Really. No problem at all.

Perhaps you can set it up so even your non-cyber friends, if you have any, will never know.

Some of us, however, consider our connections here as a kind of cyber friendship...and are concerned about our cyber friends. My comments earlier were/are for them.

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@Frank Apisa,

I'm on your side on this one (hi, Frank, surprise!). However, I get, as you do, the opposite or somewhat opposite views being reasonable too.

At this point, should I plotz suddenly, Diane will inform. I may ask my ex to, once he knows, his and other's info in my wallet, but haven't actually asked him to do that yet. We're pals by now, twenty years after breakup began, and his later wife is fine with it, continuity re past and present.

Hey, maybe I should ask my cardiologist to tell. I saw him recently for about twenty minutes, at least seven to ten of which we spent laughing. It was only the meds that made me faint last year pre five day hospitalization, the new ones work, he asked me more history stuff, found out my ex husband is younger, called me a cougar. That set us both off..) My first experience with him was oh, look, a cold authoritarian. So wrong. He's from Calcutta, savvy, could be my son.

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@Frank Apisa,

If you had actually read my post Frank, instead of scanning and basing your response on the few words you'd caught hold of, then you would realize that I have no objection to a thread such as this being formed. Fact is I appreciate them being created.

No, my point of disagreement was where and when you told members to have persons in their inner circle contact folks here and to have members here supply other members of this site with contact information. As near as one can tell, for no other purpose than to satisfy your curiosity. It was then that I made clear that this was not happening with me.

Another member or 2 (possibly more) made similar response to the words I had placed.

As per usual you opted to select just 1 person and launch your little sarcastic remarks commenting that if I disappear you won't question it. That was not what I had been objecting to.

Sadly, similar to another pompous asswipe, (who after I barely made it through a health scare advised me to: "hurry up and die"), you parade around like a genius, even dragging out 50 year old news references about you as a way to show your intellectual superiority, of which you clearly have none as you cannot even manage basic reading comprehension.

Lastly, I have at times asked about persons gone missing and have been concerned. I haven't though tried to get said member to give more information. If they choose to do so then that is their option
Not yours.

1 Reply

Okay...I will be the one who asks...

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