5
   

How should I deal with him? I think that my bf ...

 
 
Vasia W
 
Reply Sun 23 Mar, 2014 06:25 am
I think that my bf doesn't treat me right. But first of all ldt me give you a little back up. He used to be my one of my best guy friends for nine months until he confessed to me and now we have been going out fos 7 and a half months. I have supported him through many hardships and I' ve been by his side in whatever he needed me and thus I think I don't deserve the way he treats me lately. It all started a few days ago from an arguement of ours. We are both 18 and we belong to a group of friends tha consists of me and him, my two best girlfriends of 4 years, a funny dude I've known for 6 years and tha has been my best guy friend for the past year, and my boyfriend's three mates that he has known for the past 6 years. We are a crazy and bonded group of friends and we have great time together. Anyway my boyfriend told me last weekend tha he wants my support on something and he said tha what he wants is us t gradually stop hanging out and being friends with some from our group of friends, and most importantly he wants both me and him to stop hanging out with ond of his mates named B.... and my best guy friend G...... . I told him that I couldn't understand him cause things are great with everyone especially with B.... and G....., that for the first time in my life i have true friends and that I didn't want to lose that by turning my back to them for no reason. and what he ended up telling me is that he can't understand why I disagree with him, that he can't understand why I don't want to do what he wants, that he is dissapointed with me and tha if I choose to keep being friends with them he will not trust me with almost anything anymore. What i answered to him was thas since all I' ve done for him I neves expected to be treated this way, tha I respect him but he always knew that. I am an independant person who wants to take her own decisions, that if i was wrong i would admit it and tha being a couple doesn't mean that we have the same opinion oves some things. in the week tha followed he pretended everything was right and I came to believe tha he had come to his right mind at last. only we didn't speak much on the phone during the evenings cause I was too busy studying for the upcoming final exams at school. The result? Last night he told me that he didn't believe that I love him any more, that i don't care about what he wants os says and them he brought up the arguement we had tha previous weekend and because of the tone he had and how bad he made me feel i told him that i need time to relaw and then I hanged up the phone. I just can't understand his behavous and I dont't know how to react anymore. Any help?
  • Topic Stats
  • Top Replies
  • Link to this Topic
Type: Question • Score: 5 • Views: 796 • Replies: 8
No top replies

 
Olivier5
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Mar, 2014 06:55 am
@Vasia W,
The only thing that comes to mind is that he is jealous of your relation with these two other boys. Afraid that you could start to like them too much.
0 Replies
 
Ragman
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Mar, 2014 08:03 am
@Vasia W,
Sounds like he's learning how to be in an adult 'couples' relationship. He can't control, manipulate or guilt you into doing what he wants. Hold your ground (without being nasty when you share this with him).

When and if you're able to schedule/spend more one-on-one time with him (call it dates or whatever) separate from others, that'd help to re-assure him. Your finals and your time with friends are important to you. So is he...but he can't have all your time or at times all the time he wants. However, having such a large group I can understand how a b/f can feel a bit removed, too .

He's going to mature and if he realizes how he's being selfish and correct that, things can go fine. At age 18, he's still growing. He seems to need more re-assurance and perhaps some of that that has to come from within himself.
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Mar, 2014 12:03 pm
I don't know if he wants more private time with you or he's trying to isolate you from your friends. You need to figure this out. Trust your instincts if he wants you to not see your friends.

IMHO - you both are too young to be in this kind of struggle.

(Please learn punctuation and paragraph writing. Your post was so difficult to read, I stopped after about 6 lines.)


Vasia W
 
  2  
Reply Sun 23 Mar, 2014 01:26 pm
@PUNKEY,
sorry for the punctuation thing. I wrote and posted this topic from my android and I had a very difficult time doing that, since my android is for trash. English isn't my mother language, and that makes it quiet harder for me not to make mistakes.
0 Replies
 
Blondie8
 
  1  
Reply Sun 23 Mar, 2014 05:10 pm
@Vasia W,
Oh gosh. Honestly, that is not cool of him. It does sound like maybe he is insecure of something or someone when it comes to the group- I mean, you don't just hang out with a close group of friends and suddenly say, 'oh, actually, never mind , let's go our separate ways.' There's something underlying that, and you need to talk to him. NOT in an accusatory or mean way-take it from me, I don't get anywhere when I use that on my boyfriend-but try to figure out why he wants such a strange request. That is not cool of him.
Below viewing threshold (view)
Below viewing threshold (view)
Blondie8
 
  1  
Reply Mon 24 Mar, 2014 10:16 pm
@anonymously99,
That would be cool if your offensive post even made sense. If you have nothing nice to say, don't say anything. Don't be uncool.
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

 
  1. Forums
  2. » How should I deal with him? I think that my bf ...
Copyright © 2024 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 04/26/2024 at 08:34:24