Bite Mark?! Please help

Forums: Relationships, Cheating, Dating
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Hi there

I've been dating my boyfriend for 8 months. I suspect he's cheating onme because I see these weird marks on him, they look like bite marks, check it out http://www.flickr.com/photos/114040253@N07/

This mark was a lot redder, like blood coming through the skin! I was convinced it was a bite mark. Only problem is I was on ritalin and got ritalin psychosis so i started seeing bite marks everywhere even on myself! Now he says that it's me and that he's not doing anything. I don't know if I should break up with him because of this. The sex has started dwindling and the weird thing is he can't cum a lot of the time, he says he doesn't know why. He scratches himself a lot and says the marks of scratches I've seen are just him scratching his back but I don't know....

Please have a look at this photo and let me know what you think.

He lies to his parents about small stuff and he's lied to me about stuff before too so I know he's capable of lying. He says to never let people see all your stuff because they can use that against you. I had a huge fight with him the other night and called hiim a cheat, saying he wasa a coward for not telling me and that he shoulod be a real man and confess. That I needed to know. I've had this feeling of paranoia that he's cheating for a long time now and I can't seem to shake it. I don't know if that's the psychosis or not but my ex boyfriend was a porn addict for the 4 years that we were dating. I had the same feelings and thought I was going insane until he finally told me what was goingn on. I'm so worried that this will be a repeat of that. He has porn on his phone too and before told me he didn't watch it because he was with me. Sometimes he doesn't even want sex and that's not like him. When we were in another city and alone together he was totally different and wanted sex all the time, and I mean ALL the time. He even joked that he was a sex addict. He'd make comments about woman we were walking behind even, saying how he would do them. I was so hurt.

Yup, sounds like a great guy I know but I went through such a trauma, a gang rape and the guys that did it found me after 6 months and did it again. He's been with me through all of this and I'm only now starting to get better.

Please help with some advice.

Thanks

Larn

\Thanks for the reply. I am getting help and have a trauma councellor. I'm really doing well. All I want to know is if anyone else sees this bite mark.

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@Larn,

Go see your doctor and tell him/her about what you are feeling and the things you are seeing on yourself and others,

Get counseling to help you recover from the traumas.

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@Larn,

I can't tell from the quality of the photo what that is, if it's even anything. Let's assume it's nothing.

It's the other stuff that's at issue.

I think you should break up, mainly because you don't trust him. And talk to your doctor. If you're getting ritalin psychosis then you should be on something else. You do not have to live this way.

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@Larn,

I'd like to second what butterflynet said and add that the mark could be anything. It could just as easily be an allergic reaction to washing detergent.

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@jespah,

Thanks, I'm off the Ritalin, have been for months now. The psychosis stays a while but I'm on antipsychotics to help with that. I'm not seeing anything else except the bite marks. It's so frustrating!

Thanks for the comments.

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@Larn,

There's something else too. He was addicted to Heroin in his twenties. He's 34 now. He started waitering cause we moved back home after it didn't work out in another city and he's looking for a job as am I.

He was giving a lift to a guy waiter and this guy does heroin every day. I found out that he's done it 4 times or so in the past 3 weeks! Just smoking it he says. Which is bad enough for me. He told me when I was at his house one Sunday (the next morning he had this huge red bite mark - trust me it was very red then). Anyway, he told me that he had to give this guy a lift hoe from work as he didn't have a car. So he was going to go out and fetch this guy and take him home. The guy phones a lot later and asks him if he can take him to another friends house from his house. He tells me that I can't come with as he wants to discuss money the guy owes him. I'm already suspicious. Then, in his room he slips something in his pocket from his cupboard. I asked him what it was and he swaid money. Then I pressed him as I didn't believe him and he said it was tin foil, showing me. Then he said the guy asked him to bring it for him as "he thinks he's smoking mandrakes". Then I asked him if he was smoking it too and then my intuition kicked in and I asked him about heroin. Then he admitted that he's done it occasionally with this guy!

My question is, would anyone be able to be in a relationship with a guy like this?? I love him but am worried about this. He's an alcoholic too as am I. I'm fine without the booze, have been for a long time but I'm worried he's switching his dependance from alcohol to drugs. He says he's not doing it anymore though and that he's finished with it. He has a lot of pens in his car and I later found out from a private investigator that pens are used to smoke heroin with. So I'm worried that he's been doing it all along which he swears he hasn't been doing.

This is killing me. I love him and want to be with him but really. Really??

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Could be ringworm.

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@Larn,

Larn wrote:

....
My question is, would anyone be able to be in a relationship with a guy like this?? ....

You don't trust him, and you've had reason not to, as he has been lying to you, and he still is. Plus since you also have addictive tendencies (good for you for being off ritalin; sounded to me from here that it was doing you more harm than good, but keep in mind that I'm no doctor), being around someone who is giving into his own addictive tendencies is probably not going to be too good for you.

Forget for the moment that you love him. Sit down and list (use paper and pen) the goods and the bads. Just make two lists and compare them, side by side.

I think you'll find that it's not even close.

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Bite Mark?! Please help

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