Okay Phoenix, you asked for it! :wink:
I'm the President, oh goody. This is going to be fun!
Phase 1- Give a national address, not unlike Bush's. Perhaps with an even stronger warning though: "It is now vividly clear that it is an unsafe practice to allow outlaw regimes and terrorists to run amuck. The only way to end this type of terrorism; is to eradicate the funding sources, the safe havens and of course the terrorists themselves (ten minute explaining that we are not cowards, weaklings and in fact are the most powerful country on earth and we're not going to take this kind of abuse
Get the citizens really fired up!)
"I also have a message for the terrorists of the world; the enormously powerful giant that is the United States of America is now awake
and we're coming to get you
(Pause for effect while looking straight into the camera

)
"I also have a message for the other leaders of the world. Those of you who have offered your condolences and support, the people of The United States thank you. (spend about 5 minutes kissing the globe's collective ass). I ask you now to stand with us for the mutual benefit of all of mankind. The world has become too dangerous to stand by while murderers roam free, and murderous despots kill their citizens by the millions. Together we have the strength to end the generations of suffering. Together we have the resources to feed the hungry. Together, we have the power to bring peace to this planet once and for all! (pause for effect)
The United States of America is done playing nice, with criminals who do not. As of today; the United States is declaring war on every nation that sponsors terrorism. If you think your country can help us; again, the people of the United States thank you. However: If you even think your country might be on this list, contact my office immediately and we'll see if we can work something out. Listen closely now
There will be no further warnings whatsoever.
Thank you."
Next; I immediately fly to Russia and do what ever it takes to transform Putin into Tony Blair
I don't care if our countries have to merge to accomplish it, it must be done. Attempt the same with the other world leaders to a lesser degree. If we get Russia, we don't really need anyone else once we go to phase 2.
Phase 2- Meanwhile, have intelligence agencies do their jobs as they did, only when we discover there is a high probability that Bin Laden is in the Tora Bora Mountains; we retract our troops and send in the BIG GUN: the entire world goes haywire while they watch in horror as 2 nuclear tipped ICBMs (one US, one Russian), armed with 50 Mega Ton nuclear warheads (3,000 times more powerful than what we dropped on Hiroshima) turn a section of the Tora Bora Mountains into the Tora Bora Valley. Make sure we get plenty of camera angles, too.
Another speech. Apologize if our actions seem barbaric, but we wanted to let the despots and terrorists alike know we were serious. It was the hardest decision-bla bla bla.
Next I fly to Russia along with Tony and every other leader who was smart enough to sign on already. Together we form the "Planet Earth Council". Members are guaranteed absolute security, permanent sovereignty and basic sustenance for all its citizens. Free trade will be enjoyed by all member states, with member states and no others. A Human Bill of Rights will also be required for entry. Goals of council are clearly written and understood by all. Peace, by any means necessary. The final war to end all wars. Terms of membership will be written in stone and can only be altered by Unanimous Decision by all member states. Etc.
In unity, the other members of the council and I stand in Red Square (needed that to get Putin to agree to the nuke strike), and announce our alliance to the world, it's objective and the final warning to the bad guys.
"Attention: Despots and terrorists. If we even think you are planning a retaliatory strike, we will end all life in your country within 30 minutes. You know we can and you had better know we would, if we deem necessary. Listen to us carefully. We hereby demand a complete list of all undeclared WMD, locations and a plan to turn them over to us within 30 days. Of course this doesn't apply to countries that have already proven they can be trusted with such weapons. You know who you are and like I told you before, we have already declared war and you will receive no further warnings. Each and every country that voluntarily disposes of their weapons will be immediately recognized and from that day forward will be guaranteed absolute security and sovereignty, backed by the full military might of the United States, Russia etc. All countries that join in our fight to rid the world of evil oppressors will earn preferred trade status as well as security. If any nation is foolish enough to oppose us militarily, to any degree, it will be crushed. If your leader is contemplating such an action; you must immediately seize control or your country. Make no mistake; your very lives depend on it. If you are a soldier ordered to attack member states; shoot the messenger. The lives of your family depend on it. We'll be waiting for your call at 1-800- ALRIGHT or you can reach us on line at
www.IWouldRatherBeGuaranteedDinnerThanDeath.com. Call within the next 48 hours and get a Billion Dollar Loan to help get you on your feet! Call now!" Oh, I almost forgot... Pass out translated Readers Digest versions of Atlas Shrugged so all those that don't already know what to do with capitalism will. :wink: