my ex contacted me to say that she is doing well, why?

Forums: Relationships, Relationship
Email this Topic • Print this Page

I posted on here a couple of months ago. Long story short. I met a girl at a wedding in Qld. I fell for her straight away. She was from WA. We kept in touch she moved to qld. Lived together for 9 months. She relocated back due to work. I followed couple months later. Lived with her 2 months. Couldn't find work so relocated back. So we brokeup. Kept in contact. I instantly regretted leaving. So tried to go back. At first she wanted me too. Then said no because I shouldn't have left in the first place. So it became pretty emotional. I struggled. Did the whole I miss you. Give me another chance etc. But she wouldn't. In the end she said dont contact me. So I didn't for 3 weeks. Then I sent a small msg. She replied. I let it go a few days. She sent me a merry xmas msg. I wrote back. Then a couple more innocent msgs. Anyway tonight she sends me a long msg saying that she just wants me to know she is doing really well. Things in her life are are going well. That she is traveling soon. Going to gym. That she hopes I am well too. I reply saying good to hear from you. Im going to gym etc too. Was honest and said its been hard because I miss you but want you to be happy etc. She said she is more at ease with life now more relaxed, less stressed. My question is why would she tell me these things? To be nice? Make me jealous? When I was there she was only working a few hours a week. Struggling with money. Now she us working full time. Has a new room mate etc. Do I ignore her now Give it time? I love her so much still and would return in a heartbeat.

Topic Stats
Top Replies
Link to this Topic

Type: Question • Score: 4 • Views: 2,506 • Replies: 11

No top replies

@sooooconfused,

why is she telling you she's doing well?

perhaps she thinks of you as a friend and thinks that as a friend you may have been concerned about her

if you are not concerned about her, leave her alone. if your only interest is romantic, leave her alone.

if you're a friend, try to understand that she's letting you know she's doing better. end of story at this time.

I find it odd that you think that jealousy should come into play in this at all. Is it a bad thing that she is doing well - without you in her life?

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

Your right. I don't know why I said jealousy. I guess I just meant that sometimes people say they are doing better then they are. Meaning someone who says they are happy doesn't necessarily mean they are. I see her as both a friend and on a romantic level too. I love knowing she is doing well. But just miss her as a gf and her friendship too. I didn't mean to come across vain by saying how can she possibly be doing well without me.

1 Reply

@sooooconfused,

Keep communicating with her.

Maybe she is saying "I'm more grown up now" and might be open to starting the relationship up again.

Who knows? It can't hurt by finding out what's really in her mind.

1 Reply

@PUNKEY,

If we are to believe the original poster, his ex has already told him what is on her mind.

No need to risk ending the friendship by keeping the thought of romance percolating in the back of the OP's head.

1 Reply

@sooooconfused,

sooooconfused wrote:

Anyway tonight she sends me a long msg saying that she just wants me to know she is doing really well. Things in her life are are going well. That she is traveling soon. Going to gym. <snip> She said she is more at ease with life now more relaxed, less stressed.

She is less stressed, more relaxed, doing well - working - going to gym.

Be happy for her.

Move on with your own life. Hopefully she is one of those people who will be a friend through the years, after a romance ends. In the meantime, don't get hung up on the past - move on (best advice my mother ever gave me about anything - she wasn't a fan of standing still in life).

0 Replies

OK - it was either a slap in the face i.e. I'm doing lots better without you.

or

I'm feeling really good about myself and I'm re-connecting with you.

We don't know. The OP does not give us much info except to say she did write him a long email.

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

ehBeth wrote:

If we are to believe the original poster, his ex has already told him what is on her mind.

No need to risk ending the friendship by keeping the thought of romance percolating in the back of the OP's head.

Or, maybe she's changed her mind, and is interested in romance again.....or not....or something entirely different.

He'll never know by asking us.

0 Replies

you should respond that you are happy for her, but that you still wish you were together. short and sweet, and leave the ball in her court, dont contact her unless she does first.

0 Replies

Thanx to everyone for your opinion. She knows I still have feelings for her and I already told her I always wanted her to be happy. I guess I feel as though we didnt havr contact for a while and that was hard. I will give it a few days and see what happens. Last thing I said to her was and I forgot to mention was "leaving was the the thing I regret most in my life. But I will always have the memories" do you think that made me come across as though "im over it" or "its over"

0 Replies

@PUNKEY,

She initially wrote an email last week. Then a long text last night.

0 Replies

@sooooconfused,

Alright, I know this is hokie, but have you tried poetry and/or music?
http://www.metrolyrics.com/ill-be-around-lyrics-the-spinners.html

0 Replies

my ex contacted me to say that she is doing well, why?

Related Topics

Quick Links

My Account

able2know