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Adopted? How can you find your birth parents? Anybody know?

 
 
Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 06:12 pm
My best friend in the world was adopted as a baby. He knows where he was born, the exact time he was born, but doesn't know who his "real" mom is... and wants too.

He has contemplated doing this search most of his adult life, understands he might be opening Pandora's box, but hell, at 34 I'm sure he can handle whatever he learns.

It seems to me; if for no other reason than medical history; some records must have been kept. Has anyone been through this? Is it easy or hard? Is there a reputable service who'll do it for you? Do you at least know where to start? Any and all help will be greatly appreciated?

(The only place he's checked out so far wanted $800 up front and guaranteed nothing, which sounded like a scam to me.)
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Ceili
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 06:38 pm
Records are very hard to get if one party, in the case of the mother, doesn't want them released.
Different states and provinces have different laws and most of them are not friendly to the adoptee.
My best friend hired a person, an investigator to find her mother. She found out she had a sister who was also given up. Unfortunatly, it was not a warm and fuzzy situation and now she doesn't have anything to do with either family member. But at least she got some answers to some burning questions. I wish your friend luck, he'll need it
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OCCOM BILL
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:20 pm
Thank you for your comments and luck wishes darling. I doubt he'll learn anything he really wants to know, but I can understand why he wants to.
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ehBeth
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:27 pm
O'Bill, some time ago on Abuzz there was a member who was looking for her birth mother as well as her birth daughter. She found both, her daughter very recently - and the connection turned out very well, in spite of initial anxiety on both sides.

As I recall from reading about her searches, there are a number of good online resources where people who are looking for birth parents/children can help each other search. Most of them will only make the connection if both sides are willing to make the connection. In the above case, our friend discovered that she and her daughter had been looking for each other.
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Diane
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:29 pm
Occum Bill, I know a woman who has successfully found her birth daughter. I'll try to find some sites for you.
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SCoates
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:29 pm
Whoa, this may be weird, but do you think there is a chance I'm his mom?
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OCCOM BILL
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:37 pm
Milwaukee, June 2nd, 1969, what do say SCoats?
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InTraNsiTiOn
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:39 pm
SCoates- aren't you sensitive!
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Diane
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 07:41 pm
Yikes, wouldn't that be weird?
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SCoates
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 08:04 pm
Couldn't be me. I've never been out of the united states, I was born in 81, and I didn't even know there were two days in june.
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SCoates
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 08:04 pm
Oh, and I'm a boy.
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ehBeth
 
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Reply Thu 15 Apr, 2004 09:02 pm
no hits on that birthdate and state at the adoption.com reunion registry but they're not the only group.

they have quite a few links how to find your birth family

Quote:
Register in the Adoption.com Reunion Registry
Register free in the largest mutual-
consent adoption reunion registry

Search the Adoption.com Reunion Registry
Search 255,850 adoption records

Read the Online Guidlines for Locating Birthfamily

Local Informaion Relevant to Your Search
laws, libraries, agencies, yellow pages, courts, public records, reunion registries, search angels, country

Search & Reunion Forums
search by state, year and country

Online Search Tools
search engines, reverse lookup, yearbook, homepage search, maps, yellow pages, white pages, social security, obituaries

Other Reunion Registries
hundreds of other reunion registries where you can register

Petition Court & Agency for Information
sample forms you can use to petition the court and your agency

Adoption Search Angels
adoption search angels are volunteers who can help you

Hire a Search Expert

Ancestry Search search billions of family history records & learn about your ancestors

Share Your Success Story


all of that ^^^ stuff has links to resources attached at the site i linked
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OCCOM BILL
 
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Reply Fri 16 Apr, 2004 05:45 am
Thanks for the site ehBeth, I'll pass it on. Pity there wasn't a posting waiting for him already. I've dug up a few sites myself, but no matches. I'll keep trying.
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