3
   

I feel alone

 
 
Reply Sat 15 Jun, 2013 08:54 pm
I just want one person to understand me. That is all. I've been struggling lately. I can't stop obsessing over the thought that I might have Aspergers. I've always had it in the back of mind that that might be what I'm struggling with as well as thriving with. I feel so alone socially and I can only relate to people when I'm not afraid to show all of who I am. But most of the time I just hide. Even when I do open up all of the way, I'm reminded even more clearly how different I am from most others. My most prized thoughts are really abstract visuals and its hard to communicate these through words. The subjects that spark my soul alive, most people tell me make their brain hurt. My two idols who I obsess over and look up to the most are Albert Einstein and Rodney Mullen, both are people who have suspected autism. I didn't know that until after I became really interested in them. But something about them both, give me this calmness. Especially Rodney Mullen. Whenever I hear him speak, it calms me down. Whenever I research autistic stories and tendencies, there is a very strong familiarity there. I watched youtube videos of autistic people, and I feel like I understand exactly where they are coming from. Most of the time too, I completely miss out on humor and I take things really literally. More times than not, I've had to have people just say plainly, "it was a joke". I've also always had an insane obsession with animals and from what I've researched a lot people with autism do too. I just feel like I understand animals way more than the average person and ever since I was little I've felt like I needed to be the voice of animals.

I am aware that self diagnosing can be dangerous and I'm trying to avoid that at all costs. Which is why I really need feedback from people on what they think. One thing which wouldn't align with autism would be that I feel like I am extremely empathetic. I don't listen to other for their words, I listen to their emotions and I think this is one of the reasons I take jokes so literally. It's because I experience the emotion that the person is radiating out and take that as the truth of what they are saying.

If anyone has experience with Aspergers, please comment on this and make me feel a little less alone. Sad
  • Topic Stats
  • Top Replies
  • Link to this Topic
Type: Discussion • Score: 3 • Views: 980 • Replies: 10
No top replies

 
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 07:07 am
Why must you have a tag for what you feel?

You sound creative and a little self-absorbed, but social.

Enjoy your individuality and find creative outlets for all your interests.
RisingToShine
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 12:05 pm
@PUNKEY,
At the time, that was the title which felt best. I was kind of broken down writing all of this. But thank you for your input, I appreciate it.
0 Replies
 
Rickoshay75
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 12:28 pm
@RisingToShine,
I think we are all alone with our thoughts, even when we're with friends, relatives, or colleagues. Of course there are moments of feeling good, but they are usually cancelled out by disappointments, helpless feelings that seem to last much longer than good feelings.
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 06:47 pm
@Rickoshay75,
You said: Of course there are moments of feeling good, but they are usually cancelled out by disappointments, helpless feelings that seem to last much longer than good feelings.

If this is how you generally feel, you could be depressed. Have you seen a professional counselor about your negative feelings of self worth and outlook on life?
Rickoshay75
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 06:55 pm
@PUNKEY,
If this is how you generally feel, you could be depressed. Have you seen a professional counselor about your negative feelings of self worth and outlook on life? >>

Thanks for your concern, bud it really isn't needed. I learned a long time ago how to adapt to life changes.
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 07:35 pm
@Rickoshay75,
I've not really followed this thread but I'm getting interested.

Hi, to rickoshay.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sun 16 Jun, 2013 07:43 pm
@PUNKEY,
Crap, are you pumping for depression?

You could be all depressed, here, feed a councelor's kids.

Your post disgusts me, Punkey.
0 Replies
 
RisingToShine
 
  1  
Reply Mon 17 Jun, 2013 01:28 pm
@PUNKEY,
"Why must you have a tag for what you feel?

You sound creative and a little self-absorbed, but social.

Enjoy your individuality and find creative outlets for all your interests. "

So I acknowledge I need to comment more to this. I do not accept your misunderstanding of my title and implied nonacceptance of doing such. I also do not accept the label of self-absorbed. I know I am not. The energy I expend to understand myself, I equal if not exceed the energy I expend to understand others. So to take my in-depth analysis of self and downgrade it, is completely unacceptable to me and I do not sink it in. I appreciate encouraging me to enjoy my individuality and to find creative outlets-which I always strive towards so it is very kind and wise advice.

So there is a more genuine response.
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Mon 17 Jun, 2013 01:40 pm
@PUNKEY,
I'm sorry I snapped at you, Punkey. I get tired of the use of depression to explain everything, and your post was the straw that broke the camel.
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Tue 18 Jun, 2013 03:56 pm
@ossobuco,
Feel what you feel . .

I just think that someone who thinks life sucks may be depressed. Or hasn't lived long enough or been through enough to learn to be grateful
0 Replies
 
 

Related Topics

Am I strange or is this normal? - Question by blackbear
The Oddball Case of Darius McCollum - Discussion by tsarstepan
Small head, hands and feet? - Question by Ditzy722
The new abnormal -- DSM 5 - Question by boomerang
Does he have adult Aspergers? - Question by serenity166
NEWTON - EINSTEIN - Aspergers? - Discussion by Mr Stillwater
 
  1. Forums
  2. » I feel alone
Copyright © 2021 MadLab, LLC :: Terms of Service :: Privacy Policy :: Page generated in 0.03 seconds on 06/18/2021 at 10:02:25