First of all, I would like to recommend therapy. If you are unhappy with who you are, or some aspect of your life, having a therapist is very helpful in figuring out how to accept yourself and to make changes to address some of the challenges of life.
Part of the secret of life is to learn to accept yourself. I gave up trying to be "normal" a long time ago. I can't answer your questions about what normal is. A professional can give you a diagnosis (a name for you conditions). I am not sure if that matters, what matters is that you can accept yourself and learn to build a fulfilling life.
What you are describing with your job and your peers doesn't sound fun.
These are things that a therapist can help with.