Need help with girl

give her more time

Toughen up sunshine

Here is the thing. You already have her in a relationship, don't blow it by getting to pushy, too mushy or the friendship will stop as well.

Sometimes, our best friends of the opposite sex end up being a life partners but more than often not for years, until the other person goes through a whole lot of "wrong" partners only to realise the one that she/he was perfect with, was, his/her best friend.

So how long is a piece of string?

You have to just go with the flow I think. Not try to push anything or ask anything further. It makes the other person feel un-comfortable, awkward.

Just enjoy your friendship, keep those conversations about life, laugh a lot, in a months time, grab her hand... Then after a minute, smile and let it go.

People I think still like a bit of romance, a bit of chase, not quite sure, a bit of excitement.

You are going to have to just sit back and be that friend until she sees in herself that she is interested, or not. And it takes some time to get over an ex, and have no baggage to be able to move on in any event.

Teen hormones vs patience ... which wins the race?

That's not a tricky question really,

I see it as:

1. You are in the friend zone.

2. She is still interested in her ex.

Stop being so needy and step away from her. She might like to chase you, who knows. In any case, give her some room. You are being too intense too soon for her.

Yep, step away from her.

She likes having you as her 'confidant / rescuer / ego boost' etc. She won't risk that on a relationship. And you're confused because she's confusing you.

In this case, without knowing it, she'll keep playing you until the next guy catches her interest, and she'll expect you to understand because 'you're her best friend, and that's what best friends do'.

Here's a list of 'Alpha Male' traits (and before you say 'you don't care to be one' - women a genetically predispositioned to be attracted to certain male traits - they can be thought of as alpha male traits) :
- a leader (leaders of men are better providers. If you always do what she suggests, how are you a leader?)
- goes after what they want (do you get discouraged, or persist? If she discourages you easilly - she will believe you are easily discouraged and therefore poorer at providing)
- a variation : know what you want (if you don't know what you want - you won't be able to go after what you want - see above)
- stand up for themselves (if you don't, how can you provide for her and protect her?)
- can do so respectfully (the ones who don't are asses)
- are socially popular (social power leads to providing better)
- are muscular / fit (ala caveman, the strongest / fittest / most skilled were the best providers)
- excellence (men who excel are better providers)
- determination (better providers)
- passionate and have passions (this one - because strong emotions stir strong emotions, and women live in an emotional world - and passionate people follow their passions with focus, and determination, and usually excel in those areas, see above)
- energetic people (because energised people stir energised people, which enhances the emotional aspect of the world in which women live - and energetic people are better providers)

etc.

If you look at why women are attracted to 'bad boys' - you will see that bad boys usually mimic of many of the above 'provider' traits, and because they usually possess the last two traits.

That's a summary only.

Oh, and if you look at wealthy business owners, and footballers / sports stars - you'll see numerous of the same traits too.

Those traits can all be developed in the 'average' guy - but usually that requires a great deal of work (on yourself)