Well, Its been quite some time..Years infact.

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I used to post here, i dont even remember why i stopped. and i dont even know how i remembered that i used to post here and wanted to come back. but i did. I DO remember that there were some really terrific people here who gave alot of honest insight and i Loved it about this place. Its been a hell of a long time.......Heres a Recap:

Moved to honolulu, continued college to be a paramedic.
The girl i started dating Moved over with me, We saw each other for over 2 years, she got pregnant, miscarried, never told me untill we broke up and then married a guy in the army while we were still living together (akward...) So i moved out and was homeless for a while.

but it was for the best overall, and my new life was pretty damned good..I Even began speaking with my mom again after years.....it was hard as hell but our relationship was there and things were okay.....My jobs were good, i was happy there even though they wernt much and life was great, i paddled my canoe, worked out alot and things were great. Finally got my GED! and due to that I enrolled in the Hawaii national guard, it was a Huge goal of mine and the fact that i finally did it was huge. I Learned to ride motorcycles! Another huge goal of mine and bought a beautiful black kawasaki ZX6R!

Fast forward 7 months later.....

Basic training and AIT was tough, but im back in hawaii as a qualified US army Medic, I got only one of my 2 jobs back. The place i live is smaller than the barracks in the army and not as nice yet i pay $775 a month to live here. I found out my mom was still drinking, her boyfriend does too and possibly stealing from her, She's homeless now and theirs nothing i can do for her and it breaks my heart. It seems the relationship we built up has crumbled within a matter of days within my return back and i havnt heard from her since. My boat is Sold and i dont have the money to buy a new one, The people watching my things Stole some of my stuff, and my beautiful bike is stuck in storage untill i get a second job to get it out and legal and running......
Im obviously single and while ive gone on a few dates all the women have been......completely insane to put it lightly. I gave up the entire life i built to join the army, and its proving extremely difficult to get that life back. but im holding onto the glimmer of hope that i just need a bit more time and everything will begin to fall into place.i just keep asking myself.....

. Shouldnt i be like.....married or in a serious relationship? Shouldnt i have my career ironed out by now instead of still working on it? Shouldnt i have a decent place instead of renting a room in a house that totally is shitty and small? Come home to a Dog and someone who loves me?

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Type: Discussion • Score: 9 • Views: 1,152 • Replies: 19

@mrhunt,

Good progress. I seem to recall you were working in some kind of fast food joint.

1 Reply

@roger,

Ive always worked restaurants in some capacity. I still do.

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@mrhunt,

Welcome back!

My, what a lot has happened.

I'm a bit not getting some stuff.....you're an army medic but working in a restaurant? You need another job? can you explain?

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@dlowan,

He trained in the Army National Guard, which means he completes standard training, then returns to civilian life, and attends monthly meetings and two weeks of training exercises once a year. He is subject to be called up for full-time, active service at need.

1 Reply

@mrhunt,

mrhunt:
Welcome back.

Interesting story......, it's going to make for some good anecdotes for the grandkids when they ask you "Before you met Nana, were you in Hawaii?"

Quote:

Im obviously single and while ive gone on a few dates all the women have been......completely insane to put it lightly. I gave up the entire life i built to join the army, and its proving extremely difficult to get that life back. but im holding onto the glimmer of hope that i just need a bit more time and everything will begin to fall into place.i just keep asking myself.....

. Shouldnt i be like.....married or in a serious relationship? Shouldnt i have my career ironed out by now instead of still working on it? Shouldnt i have a decent place instead of renting a room in a house that totally is shitty and small? Come home to a Dog and someone who loves me?

Keep the glimmer going and keep imagining how you want things to be. Imagine finding that decent place, that ironed-out career, that non-insane lover and what kind of dog you want to see poking at the door as you come up the sidewalk.

Make more friends, try to find people to watch your stuff who need your stuff less than you do.

The changes will come.

~I'm sorry about your mom. It's tough to be essentially motherless. Tough.

I want to say one more thing :
Way to go on how far you've managed to go.
You are making a life on your own and having to find all of your own ways of getting to your goals. It's a remarkable thing in this day of kids staying in their parent's house until they are 32 without ever paying a dime in rent or doing a load of laundry and you should be very proud of where you are now.

Let us know how you are doing.
Ask us questions about maybe doing a budget to find more money to get out of the crappy room or whatever strikes you.

We're here.

Well done, mrhunt.

Joe(good on yah)Nation

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five years after meeting you your life is the same nowhere....it is time to look deep and to try to figure out you are doing wrong. why do you never get the girl? why are you not moving up to a living wage management position? why do your friends and dating choices suck? it all goes back to you. this is fixable, but you must do the work.

my impression has always been that you work very very hard to avoid dealing with yourself...working insane hours in low paying jobs and then blowing the money on toys and useless women is a part of that.

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@hawkeye10,

one big clue is that you think you are a great boy friend, only no one else seems to think so. there is here a huge disconnect between your beliefs and reality.

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Mr. Hunt: I have often wondered whatever happened to you.

Not a bad story. The fact that you got thru boot camp tells me you can handle just about anything.

Same flaw is there, however: naively trusting people who do no good to you, in fact, treat you with dishonesty and in hurtful ways. Can you find some new friends?

Lookin' for love in all the wrong places, as the song says.

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I was reading an old thread you were posting on the other day, and for some reason I called you 'Mike'. Channelling my inner porkies or was did you mention it somewhere?

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@Setanta,

Ah, thank you. Now I get it.

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@mrhunt,

Welcome back mrhunt.

It looks like you were able to achieve a number of your goals when you went after them.

Got your GED, enrolled in the national guard, completed basic training, bought a motorcycle, you're a qualified army medic - that's a fair bit.

The relationship/family side of thing has been more difficult for you - that's the case for many of us. You have to figure out what is worth going after and whether those goals are achievable.

Are you qualified as a paramedic as well as a medic now? will you be able to apply for work in the emergency services area? could you get a job as a nurse of some type to get into medical employment? are there transferable skills and licences?

1 Reply

@ehBeth,

I'm agreeing with ehBeth, Mr. Hunt. Good to hear your achievements.
I see some work for you to do understanding yourself and how you deal with relationships, but many humans have difficulties in that area. Perhaps now that you've moved ahead on other aspects you can develop more self regard. That's not a do-it-in-one-day thing, but it can be done.

I'm happy to see you back here.

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Mike, good to see you!

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@hawkeye10,

one big clue is that you think you are a great boy friend, only no one else seems to think so. there is here a huge disconnect between your beliefs and reality.
____________________________
Sorry, i couldnt figure out how to use the quote feature on here!

Well Hawkeye.....The Fact is that i THOUGHT i was a great boyfriend, but with Time and Experience (as well as hind sight being 20/20) Ive come to realize that im far from it. I use women and throw them away and its wrong and its something that ive Just recently realized within the last year and am working hard to rectify within myself. So while in the past where i was younger and more immature i may have thought so.....but now i see the truth of how i am in relationships, trust me.

You also mentioned something about "running away from myself" Due to working dead end jobs and insane hours....Its true that im a total workaholic, but since ive gotten back Ive been working my ass off just to try to get into a hospital Or Even CNA position, something that i can enjoy and will be more of a career for me......So far even with my Medic qualifications (EMT-B Certified) nobodys biting....and i have to pay the bills, huh? So I go back and work at the old restaurant i used to....

And FYI, Im one of the managers there and answer only to the owner and GM. So i feel that while its a job choice that i dont wanna be in, its not the worst thing in the world, and it helps pay the bills.

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@hawkeye10,

and To further answer your questions hawkeye10.....I dont get the girl (NOW) because i realize my flaws in relationships and am trying not to hurt anybody else like i have in my past relationships. I was dating a girl Just a week ago who was Quite "into me" if you will......and i led her along and told her what she wanted to hear......

And then i came clean, I told her flat out the kind of guy i really was, what i was about and that i didnt like it and was trying to change it. that she deserved someone better than that, and i ended things.

As for the "friends" who watched my belongings, heres what happened. My ACTUAL Friend who was watching the stuff bailed cause his dad was dying of cancer, he called me and explained that his roommates would continue to watch my things and my vehicle......I didnt know his roommates and they didnt know me, it was strangers watching my things.Sketchy but nothing i could do from oklahoma....unfortunate situation but thats the deal.

And lastly, im EXTREMELY Frugal with my money, i Definately Dont "blow" it on women, and as for toys, yeah i have a nice streetbike and yeah I have a PS3 and nice HDTV but I also have a fat savings account. Im smart with my money, Im never broke and never have been and hope that i never will be.

I honestly only have 2 REAL Friends, and Ive known them both for 10+ years now and Have trusted them and Told them Everything in my life and they've always been there for me, My one friend is more of a father than my own dad. So my choices in friends is pretty awsome, I dont have many but the few i do have are pretty incredible.

1 Reply

@mrhunt,

in your defensive posturing you do admit to being a workaholic so purhaps one day we will see some progress out of you.

so 5 years go you had $15k collecting dust in the bank.....I take it almost all gone now since you are whinning about your crappy room and not being able to use your bike or help your mom. but I am enjoying watching how fast you change your song and dance, today life is fine....right?

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I advise ignoring that sour-puss Whackeye. It seems he is only interested in defaming you. He certainly is not offering anything constructive.

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@hawkeye10,

No, Today that amount in my savings has more than doubled actually. I dont help my mom because throwing money at the situation wont help her choices or What she's chosen to do with her life.

And ultimately i dont Get my bike out of storage cause im living at a place where i dont trust my neighbors and the ground is so bad i can barely drive my car on it so im definately not gonna park a motorcycle on it and have it fall... This place is just temporary though and imma be moving in a month or so.

I dont touch my savings, Its cause i save it. Maybe for a house one day, Who knows. But i do feel that your kinda harshly judging me without knowing 100% of the facts. Im not even trying to be defensive, im just trying to explain things so there in a more clear light....

And trust me, I DO appreciate Your Matter of fact thought on things cause in some aspects your right and it helps, In alot your Not but thats okay too.

Smile

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@Setanta,

Excellent advice, Set.

Joe( I hope MrHunt takes it.)Nation

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Well, Its been quite some time..Years infact.

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