Divorce?

not like she hasnt before right?

If your implying that there were issues with extramarital affairs, then you would be incorrect.

I'm sorry you're still dealing with the thicket part.

I am curious about how it is going for you. Did you try mediation? Are you able to be amicable? My wife and I started to fight, and then each of us thought better and we are in mediation.

I am glad to hear that you had your court date.

My ex and I had a simple procedure - we talked and given our life together, the decisions made sense to both of us and we used some simple civil procedure, very straightforward. In retrospect, it was good of him to give me the house (he was on the up re income and realized that was fair), which I soon had to sell, so we both lost our place to people who would re do it several times (weep).

We had always varied on who was paying the freight at any given time, and that ended up, over the years, let's say 25, about equal. I was quite older, he was the most interesting man in forever. He needed out. I get that, however badly I felt.

As my cardiologist just this week - twenty years later - told me on interviewing me on my connections for, natch, elder care, said exclaiming, you're a cougar!! This is especially funny as he is from India and I wouldn't guess he knew the word's context. So, I left the place with both of us laughing.

Anyway, we still talk because 25 years are a big part of our lives. Not regurgitating stuff, but what is going on now.

@Baldimo uh huh keep telling yourself that. some mid twenty year old has probably already been all up in that.

20 something? I doubt they couldn't handle her, she'd tear them apart. If that is the case then more power to both of them.

Sometimes when people disconnect it is because they aren't able to communicate. Has she always been Christian? Have you always not been? When people are disconnected they make assumptions about one another. Being a Christian doesn't mean a man will not cheat. Funny (not ha-ha) : a friend of mine lost his wife to the preacher. I think you need to sit down together and talk. Resentment and anger builds over time. Anger on both sides makes can often make people say hurtful things. Tell her how you feel in a non-accusatory manner. It is natural for a person to look in the direction of an attractive person without desiring to cheat. Having said that I've seen men be disrespectful to their wives by gawking at women. You should be able to watch or read whatever you want. However, if it's porn and becomes excessive it can affect your relationship. Nobody should throw you out of your own bedroom!! Make it clear that if differences are not resolved your marriage will dissolve. Maybe marriage counseling can help. Has she ever said anything about you having to turn your head at a nude scene? If she hasn't, you may be a little quick to jump to conclusions. There's always two sides to a story. It sounds like she doesn't feel safe in the relationship. People interpret anger to mean many things. Best of luck to you.

Well it is officially over, I'm divorced. The long of the short of it goes like this: She got the house, which was planned, and only has to pay me money for it if she sells it prior to taking over the mortgage. If she refies within a year, the house is hers free and clear of any money to me. We are splitting time with the children. My oldest being a senior in hs, won't have to stay the week or weekends with me due to his schedule, school during the week and he works the weekends. I'm a little sad about this but he is 17 and has his own life to live. I get to see him though and that makes me happy. We split our time with the youngest, he's 14 and a freshmen. Every other weekend is ok with me as he goes to school during the week to a boarding school.

When it comes to the ex-wife, I have to pay maintenance, same as alimony, and child support. I think I'm getting a little screwed on this the maintenance but it is a small price to pay to be free. Total of the 2 combined is a little under 2 grand a month but I get to keep all of my own retirement, 401k and stock plans. The biggest down side is she gets maintenance for 9 years, half the time of our marriage.

Over all I'm happier then I have been in years, I seem to have more money, despite the amount I am paying per month and I'm free. Winner winner chicken dinner.

Hoping for the best for you.

My resettling after divorce (1994) took a while to sort out but eventually I found my stride. We went through a civil mediation. Once we drew up papers and a list (ledger) of what we both wanted (on our own), a legal representative formalized it. There were no children and there was nothing contentious - just a house which she kept but she bought out my share of the built-up equity. I found a new lifestyle and new life.

The good of it for me was the pressure off of me having to pay a mortgage. Emotionally, we just weren't meant to be forever partners. We spent 7 years together and grew in separate ways. No infidelity happened with either of us.

I wish you good luck and good energy.

Good. Sad in its way, but to me it's good that you're out of it and moving on.

Sigh. Go get your life back Bro.

Hi guys!
when I hear the word Divorce I become so angry!!!

Well I guess that rules out marriage counseling in your career prospects.