What's Wrong With This Paragraph?

I just wrote this garbage. How would you word it? What's wrong with it?

In death I was alive. An essence enveloped by a light of love. I felt as a babe in the caring, protective bosom of its mother. It was love eternal. A divine warmth carried me, in gentle, invisible hands, into a fantastic scene: before my eyes the roaring rage of the sun, fixed in the blackness of space, appeared in waves of orange-red flames. Above me a choir of sweet angelic voices seductively called for me to retire to my celestial home. At a distance an assemblage of familiar faces with fine white garments, stationed at the end of curved path, summoned me with outstretched arms toward a broad, towering threshold. At its ends, massive gates were opened wide; supported on either side by two majestic pillars of exquisite gold, reaching high into the eternal obscurity of the universe.