He loves me but I feel he is afraid because of my HIV status

I have been in a relationship with this guy going on three years. We met through a person we know mutually two years ago. Before we consummated our relationship, I disclosed my HIV positive status. I've been positive for 11 years and have been living a healthy, undetectable existence ever since. I know how I contracted HIV and by whom, which was while engaging in safer sex while using a condom. Unbeknownst to me, the condom broke. I disclosed all of this to my BF last year, January of 2011.

We had awesome sex initially: on the stairs, the floor, the chair, the bed, on a cruise, etc. Then, 6 months later, the sex ended. I am uncertain how it ended but it just stopped. I pondered various scenarios but nothing seemed to pan out. I initiated discussions with him over a dozen times but he doesn't like to talk about issues and have a knack of changing the subject.

When we sleep together, we hold each other in a very intimate way but it doesn't lead to anything sexual. I have provided a platform for honest disclosure meaning if his feelings for me changed I just wanted to know. I am a realist to know that people change and have the right to do so. But, I would think that honesty would play a crucial role by informing the person of such changes if that were indeed the case. He indicates that it isn't that at all; that he loves me deeply. He indicated that he just hasn't felt sexual. I am 41 and he is 50. I have noticed the lube in his closet depleting over the course of several months. He says he masterbates often as I do as well.

Now, we are going on three years in this "relationship." We are very close, like brothers rather than partners. He is a very significant part of my life as I am to his. We talk to each other throughout the day. We see each other throughout the week. And, we spend literally every weekend together. We go on trips together all of the time. My mother absolutely adores him.

We are exploring the idea of moving to another city together. I know that he loves me very much, but I want someone to be in love with me. I idealize love a great deal and believe in that magical feeling that you get. He doesn't believe in that. Also, I would like to be married someday in one of the few states where it is legal. He doesn't see it in his future, but he loves me very much.

Please help! I don't know what to do.