Was she being shy or no interest at all?

Reply Wed 31 Oct, 2012 08:49 pm
Came across a girl at work,we never introduced ourselves due to awkwardness...everything was normal as time went on i started noticing alot of eye contact (more than usual) alot of body language signs..somedays she could keep eye contact other times she would look,look away,then look right back.EVERY SINGLE DAY at work passing her i would always have to be the one to say hi how are you..ive put it off a few times to see if she would greet me first,but it never happend..everytime we were in the same room i felt she was looking at me from the corner of her eye to see if i was checking her out. One day i was talking to some girls and she was about 20feet behind them i could see her eyes locked on me dead eyed.As time went on there would be times where i would look into her eyes and as she was walking away she would make a small soft giggle to her self..sometimes after a small convo she would giggle and smile before walking away. i never had called her by her name untill the day i asked her out.i saw her walking infront of me (her back was facing towards me) i called her name out and she immediatley froze dead in place her shoulders rose in the air slightly..she did not turn around and she said "hmm?" so i walked up to the side of her (she was still facing the same direction) i asked if she was doing anything over the weekend and if she was with anybody,and she said she would have to see,so i then asked for her number..she told me to write mine down and leave it in the office thru the whole 40seconds of asking her out she DIDNT MAKE ANY EYE CONTACT,i wasnt expecting to hear that so at the time i took it as rejection,thinking she would of just gave me hers to begin with,i then realized i didnt fully get rejected so i decided to message her,it was probobally 2-3 paragraphs explaining everything if she was trying to become friends or had some kind of interest or she had attraction,she hasnt responded not sure if she knows how to or she is just plain not interested,what do you think?
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Reply Wed 31 Oct, 2012 10:19 pm
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Reply Thu 1 Nov, 2012 07:30 am
So, let me see if I got this straight. You and this gal looked at each other but did not speak for how long? A month? A year?

But you did not speak and did not introduce yourselves.

And now, seemingly out of the blue, you call her by name and then you text her.

She is thinking - How does he know my name? How does he know my texting info? He was just some guy I smiled at, at work!

If I were her, I'd be freaked out, and I bet she is, too. There is a high likelihood that she is blocking you from any future messaging. From her perspective, you are a relative stranger who she never gave personal information to, but who somehow has it. And that can mean that you feel like a stalker to her.

Moral of the story - don't skip over vital steps! And the MOST vital step was either one of you going up to the other one, sticking your hand out and saying, "Hi, I'm ____. I noticed you are always so cheerful every morning. I bet you know where to get the really good coffee around here." Since you were interested in the contact, and she was not initiating it, and it was important to you, it was up to YOU to initiate it.

Instead, now, I bet it feels creepy to her. That "not introducing due to awkwardness" has now turned into "never talking because you've creeped her out."
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Reply Thu 1 Nov, 2012 09:21 am
Or maybe you only think she has been eyeing you and what not because you think too highly of yourself.
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Reply Thu 1 Nov, 2012 03:28 pm
I'm guessing she's always looking t you because you're always looking at her, and she's the nervous type.

If she doesn't say hi to you ever, first, she's not interested.

If she freezes in place when you say hello from behind you such that she can't even turn to look at you - have you never heard of the fight, flight or freeze response to danger?

You ask her out and she doesn't agree, and won't even look at you - she just asks you to write down your number (the easiest way not to offend you by rejecting you, and therefore avoid any conflict when she's put on the spot by you) and then doesn't call...shouldn't that tell you something?

Then you send her a novel, where 1 line would have been appropriate?
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