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Mon 22 Oct, 2012 10:15 am
Good evening, everybody! Here's my situation
I and my girl have been friends for months. She has just broken up with her boy recently so I know she's available. Her mood is getting better and she show some signs like: starting conversations with me more often [we haven't talk much in the past], touching me and laughing when I tease her [my shoulder, my hip], answering my text immediately everytime [never let me wait for a minute], her body language also warm and welcoming, too..So, I guess she's trying to get closer.
Two weeks ago, I were at her place [she lives in a pagoda but not a sister. Her hometown is far from the city, she just lives there to get to school easier] while she went out. When she got back, I asked her to go to the bookstore with my that night and she said "ok". One hour later, she texted me and asked if we could go right at that moment because she was busy that [Sunday] night. We didnt went out together 'cause I didnt want to be so desperate and let her take control.
Last Saturday, I texted her to ask her out on Sunday night for some ice cream and she accepted the invitation. At 4.00 pm on Sunday, she texted that she couldn't make it 'cause she didn't have the reason to go out at night since her school was off. She said we could go out Monday night so then she have a legitimate reason to go out [she studies at night]. I didnt accept and said another time.
That's it! I dont know what to do. I mean, she had the whole Sat. evening and Sunday morning to tell me but she didnt! Why did she have to wait until 16:00? She did suggest another plan on both times but that doesnt change the fact she flakes.
Both times were Sun. evening. Maybe she she can not go out on specific night [she lives in a pagoda and under control of the master, you know]? Should I tolerate and try another FINAL time? I need your advice. Thanks for your time.
p/s: I know this is long but I just wanna make sure you guys know the situation in details. Thanks for helping me!
@joethekid,
Hiya Joe.
It's a lot of push-pull, eh?
Maybe you're right, that it is a scheduling thing. You can ask, e. g.
I'd like to go out some time but it seems like you're booked on some days. Is there some schedule that the pagoda requires you adhere to? And see what she says, as you may very well be spot on. Or, she might be screwin' with your head. That is also possible, of course.
Note - I am not dismissing this outright as I went to college with a gal who lived in a women's-only dorm that had considerably stricter rules than the rest of campus. She could not have a guy in her room at all unless he was related to her or helping her move in or out (e. g. even studying together was not allowed - of course they didn't give a damn/couldn't possibly police people going to the library, etc.).
@joethekid,
You have made plans twice. She has suggested alternatives twice. You have turned her down twice. You apparently don't want to accept the alternatives as you don't want to let her take control.
I would suggest contacting her and asking her when it is a good time to get together. Agree to her suggested time/place. If she needs to reschedule again, agree to it. If that doesn't work out, I think you've probably done enough to try and go out with her.
A little flexibility on your part is probably a good idea.
Are we talkin' dandruff here?
@Setanta,
That's what I thought. Head & Shoulders.
@Mame,
I've heard of head but what do you do with shoulders?
@ehBeth,
I agree with @ehBeth you need to show some sensitivity to her strict schudules, and give her the comfort of accepting her time!!! if she cancels her own given time at the last moment, it's probably time to move on!!!
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