Got the decission from the court (in the city where aunt's hopsital is) today: I'm her legal guardian for the next 6 months, then the court here has to decide again.
(Date for the decission about mother is on February 18.)
Walter--
Progress, progress.
Is your sister interested in being a guardian or does she want to retain her amateur status for the World Bitching Olympics?
My sister has this time the correct idea: 280 miles away is a bit too far ...
Walter--
I arm-wrestled the sister of one of the fringes of Mr. Noddy's family for the Glorious Complications of being guardian. Sister was 3000 miles away in California.
She settled for giving me long distance advice for 29 years.
Sorry, your sister misses the Blue Ribbon this time.
Did somebody ask about my sister?
She just phoned me.
I had sent her a copy of the court order installing me as leagl guardian.
So she got that letter today and instantly asked me ... not about my aunt's health or where she is going to stay or .... but about her finances.
I onlöy told her that my aunnt got "enough money", and if she wanted it more precisely she should ask the court/judge.
Then she told me as a relative she had right to know everything.
I explained my 'slightly' different opinion a bit louder and finished the call.
Then, Mrs Walter phoned her, explained all in a more normal voice (again) - and told the sum plus the fact that I have to show (and explain) all expenses to the court, can't spend more than a certain amount without the judge's consent ... And Mrs Walter told me sister that we (I) would send her all papers concerning my aunt as copy.
This time my sister ended the phone call abruptly.
And didn't answer further calls.
So I spoke to her answering maschine, excused for my loud voice and that I hung up on so. I would inform the judge that I'll send her all infos but didn't considered that only to be informal since of course all relatives had to know what is going on the same moment it happens.
I short stopped asking about my sister's and BIL's finances.
Mental Decline
Quote:of course all relatives had to know what is going on the same moment it happens.
Perhaps your sister would prefer knowing what is going on
before it happens?
My sister is just keen on knowing all about MONEY.
(I should have asked her, too, if she had asked such questions re my aunt [father's sister] in Austria as well.)
Honestly, I'm quite upset.
Just imagine this quite normal scenario: someone gets a leagal guardian, a social worker at a town/county office, with a charity and doing it self-employed [those are the other possibilities here if it's not done by a volunteer].
So you go in the office, tell her/him that you are the niece, met your aunt about 10 minutes twice per year over the last 40 years, that her finances were unknown to everybody and the last time (due to her illness) even to herself, but now YOU want to know everything about it ...
Walter--
You have my sympathy.
Briefly I was the court-appointed financial guardian for my stepson's uncle. His sister who hadn't been in touch with him for 20 years complained bitterly about this unfairness.
I thought your sister wanted to remember your aunt as she was? Inconsistant woman, your sister.
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
When there was a family war over my mother's mental incapacity, I asked to be appointed her guardian, but the judge - thank God - appointed our lawyer & the lawyer for the other side joint guardians. Whenever I think of the financial records that would have been involved, I say again, thank God.
Mr. Noddy just had a rip snorting tantrum.
His medical plan includes prescription coverage with co-pays of $8 and $15 for 90 days supplies of meds--provided they are done through a central, mail order pharmacy.
This pharmacy has changed their system for renewal. Instead of chatty telephone calls, they want the Rx faxed from a doctor's office with renewals pre-authorized.
Mr. Noddy intended to continue making chatty phone calls.
Now his doctor's office will not fill Rx requests by phone. They want the patient to be organized and get refills during office visits.
Mr. Noddy went off the wall, shouting and screaming about "they" were being unfair. When I didn't show great sympathy (I'm feeling physically rotten right now and capable of only mild sympathy) I joined the ranks of "they" and was yelled at personally.
Another day, another tantrum.
Tantrums are tiring.
(hoping your health improves speedily, Noddy.. )
Thanks, Osso. A nap will help.
Mental Decline & Dependency/Coping With Aging Loved Ones
Oh, Noddy - you are having a rotten time, and I'm so sorry.
I hope, the nap really will be a good one!
Hold your dominion, Noddy.
Tomkitten, Walter, Swimpy--
Thanks for the sympathy.
"Awareness of the needs of others" seems to be deteriorating along with memory and judgement.
This is challenging to live with.
I wish I could say this is a temporary situation, noddy, but I'm afraid that it's the beginning of the a transition in mr noddy's demeanor. I'm sure 'tiring' is an understatement.
JPB--
What can't be cured, must be endured.
But I can vent.
Noddy- I am so sorry. It is so difficult keeping everything together, when your partner is behaving like a blithering idiot.
Keep venting. It's good for the nerves, and you know that we are listening!!!
Kvetching, they call it, no?
Vent, vent, vent! Good for mental health.
