Uncomfortable Niece and family

I don't really think there is anything you can or should say. It's not your family. It's up to your husband, if he wants to, or the widowed son.

If my daughter was kissing and touching her b/f inappropriately in front of family (which I find gross to watch), I would take her aside and say something, but... if it were my husband's or sister's family, I wouldn't say anything to the 'kids'. I'd probably say something to my sister, but that's it.

My mother used to get nauseous when another sister and her new guy used to do that all the time and she'd always say, "Get a room!"

I appreciate your feelings about this; really I do. Really though, this is sort of her son's cross to bear. She may be having mental problems, especially at that age, and he feels it is somewhat better to cater to her condition than to meet it head on. We don't know, and possibly you don't either.

In other words, I think you will have to suffer in relative silence, though there's nothing wrong with avoiding her and his presence as much as possible.

Oy, was that pun intended, Mr. R?

No, but thanks for pointing it out. I now feel marginally smarter.

We'll keep that between us, Rog, and everyone else can think you meant it.

Are you gardening this year? I'm just getting into it since it's warmed up a bit.

Not to speak of. I may plant a small spread of panseys or petunias if I do it early. If I keep putting it off, I may go with impatiens. Lots of color and minimal labor. This is for me.

I love impatiens. Did you know there's a perennial variety? A lot bigger, and with darker leaves. Forget the name just now but you can google it.

No, I never heard of such a thing. I may just give it a google. Then again, this is such a low priority project, I'm likely to grab something colorful locally, and just stick it in the ground.

oh, this is the first time i read stories like this..
she's 81, mental problem, probably?

Don't provide an opportunity for her to answer any questions to start with..

She may have dementia, she is 81, if she gets upset when corrected, that her son is not her husband, that would be my immediate thought..

I think it's great that you have provided room for your 81 year old Aunt, but her son? 58, still has a life out there and maybe the solution is to get him out more, mingling with people, finding himself a lady and moving on and out.