nervous about seeing my ex for the first time since a huge fight

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So last week I got into a argument with my ex girlfriend we were hanging out and things were going well for about a week then I found out she was seeing soneone else and she denied it even tho her friend told me all yhe details ,I am extremely unhappy with her but were going to see eachother today for a few hoyrs since the fight we haven't talked really then out of the blue yesterday she sent me a text saying just so you know I will not be talking to you about anything when I see you I don't care who ur sleeping with or who ur seeing ok? Why would she say that she obviously wants to avoid another conflict like last weekend I have known her for years and would like to remain in contact I don't know how to act today ill b with her for 4 hours she also claimed that after today she's done whatever that means , if that's the case then Why is she even seeing me today ? Any suggestions my plan is to keep ny cool not fight and just slip into no contact after tonight . She is extremely jealous two weeks ago she told me I better not be seeing anyone else and now she's claiming she doesbt care becauee she met this other guy . Idk wgat to do

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@johnjohnjohn7875,

When you break up, you lose the privilege of really bitching about/caring about who your ex is sleeping with.

This does not mean that your emotions are turned off but, rather, that the person is an ex. Jealousy should subside - they are not your lover anymore! You (and she) need to wrap your head around the fact that things have changed. Being broken up means that, by definition, everyone is allowed to move on and see someone else. If that cannot be understood, then it's best to stay away from each other until it is understood.

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@jespah,

I understand that but its not like we just broke up we broke up in decmeber and since then she has asked me if we can be friends but its hard then she fooled me into thinking things were getting better then she met this other guy and took off and expects me to be ok with that .. now all of a sudden her jealousy has dissapeared and she said depending on how today goes maybe we can be friends last weekend she told me she never wanted to see me or speak to me again and yet here we are a week later seeing eachother for a few hours

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@johnjohnjohn7875,

johnjohnjohn7875 wrote:

she said depending on how today goes maybe we can be friends last weekend she told me she never wanted to see me or speak to me again

"Maybe we can be friends?" Who does she think she is? Get off your knees. Ignore her for six months and see how you feel after that.

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@johnjohnjohn7875,

My gawd, are you that dense or what's wrong with you?
She is your ex girlfriend and she doesn't want to be with you - accept it and move on!!

Just about everyone suggested this to you in the other thread you have opened up. Unless you want to make a complete fool out of yourself, go ahead and continue like you do now.....

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@johnjohnjohn7875,

You are missing the concept of "ex". It's done, over, finished. You should forget about her and get on with your life.

There is no reason to keep playing games after a relationship is over (and if she is seeing someone else, it is over). I would send her a text saying you don't want to see her and be done with it. You don't have any obligation to see her or talk to her, a text is fine. Why put your self in a uncomfortable and awkward situations.

Just send a text to cancel and move on.

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Well, I'm all for those last "discussions" - maybe to try to see if anything can be salvaged out of the relationship. But two people have to agree to TALK about issues. (Like what are the deal breakers, what you can live with, compromises, etc.) It can be an agreement to start over.

So . . . I wonder why SHE is agreeing to see you "for a little while." What's her motive? Clearly, you want to talk about the relationship, but it's not clear why she even wants to spend any time with you. You really need to find out what her intentions are.

Be ready to let her go finally. Sorry - but being "friends" can't happen this fast. Maybe after 6 months from now, but things are too raw for you right now.

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@johnjohnjohn7875,

Don't go.
Don't even cancel by text.
Just don't go.
And don't answer her texts asking what happened?
What happened was it's over between the two of you.
So.
Be free.
Go somewhere fun tonight.
Do not stay home.
Do not answer your phone.
Call three friends and meet for burgers and beers and watch some sports team get punched around.

(erm, The NY Knicks are going to get creamed UNLESS somebody needs to sell more tickets. discuss.)

It is not worth your energy or time to spend an ounce or a second more of either about this crap.

I promise you in a year (because you will be happy) you won't remember any of this except maybe the fact that your burger was overcooked and you had to send it back.

GO!
Joe(best advice anybody ever gave me, now you get it)Nation

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Didn't we all go over this with the last couple of days?

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@chai2,

Yes! Apparently he didn't like the answers there, so he rephrased his
intent to sweet talk himself into a new definition of "ex-girlfriend" and hopes
to get some more choice words he likes.

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Ain't gonna stop asking till he gets the answer he wants.

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nervous about seeing my ex for the first time since a huge fight

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