Relationship Based on Personality, Not Looks?

Forums: Relationships, Gay, Dating, Friendship
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For the first time in my life, a guy asked me out. I've been desperate, considering I've never been in a relationship, and there aren't many nice gay guys in my area. I'll be honest though- I don't find him physically attractive, but he's really sweet. We met just a few days ago. Is it shallow for me to not like him based solely on his looks? I really like him as a person, is it weird to have a boyfriend that I'd basucally be very good friends with (though I'd be open to kissing and holding hands), or should we just stay friends?

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Type: Question • Score: 2 • Views: 2,052 • Replies: 7

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@mouthofrandom,

Yes, but shallow or not, you don't like the guy romantically. Doesn't much matter why.

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@mouthofrandom,

Quote:

... or should we just stay friends?

Not meaning you any disrespect, but how could we know what you feel and want?

If someone doesn't turn you on, personally I don't see much sense in pursing anything, but that is just how I operate because what I seek is a long term relationship.

What is it that you're seeking? If what you want is SOME sort of dating experiences, perhaps you should be upfront and let him know this?

Why not go out with him and see how you feel. Perhaps he'svery charming and sincere? Does that matter to you?

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@mouthofrandom,

Well, if you met a few days ago, how can you be good friends?

That doesn't make sense.

Also, physical attraction for sure is chemistry.. But, getting to know someone can create chemistry, are you open to get to know the person "inside"... Instead of just the outside?

There is you key

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Well, he can't turn you completely off, since you are willing to "kiss and hold hands."

While I agree that first sparks based on looks is exciting, the best, long living kind of relationshp starts off as being a friend.

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@mouthofrandom,

I agree with one comment. if your willing to kiss and hold hands i guess theres something you must like in him. both my childrens fathers are not attractive AT ALL and i dont mind it either infact im marrying one so i say stick along u might end up falling in love. but if u have thought of leaving him well then leave him

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@mouthofrandom,

I would go out with him in as non-romantic a way as possible and get to know him. Many times a person can become more attractive as you get to know them better. (And just as often they can become less attractive.)

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@mouthofrandom,

Goodlooking guys are a dime a dozen, if they have no personality and just sit there looking pretty their of no good to me Wink

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Relationship Based on Personality, Not Looks?

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