my gf wants to date other people till the end of this month

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Me and my girlfriend have been in a distant relationship since 2009. Now she says she is misserable and bored. She also wants to take a break to date other people till the end of this month. What should I do to keep us together. I have always fought for us to stay together and so has she. Plus i have made alot of sacrifices for her to help her, even took the brunt of her deppression and loneliness. She used to hate to hurt me and now that seems different. She will hardly ever text me and call but yet she wants to play games like words with friends and draw free. She also does not deny that she wants to be with me. As well she wants to meet people while at her new college. What should i do because she still wants to be with me but wants all of this and it is confusing her. I have also given her space and the last thing i told her was that I will always love her no matter what she does to me and that i would always be there if she needs my help or someone to talk to.

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Type: Question • Score: 6 • Views: 1,574 • Replies: 7

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@Peebles1,

she is just wanting you to wait around until she meets someone and if it goes wrong she will expect you to wait. The point is that if she truly loved you she would not want to date other people.

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Having just gone thru this 'we need to date others" thing, I can tell you that you need to be prepared.

She is really saying that something is missing from your relationship - she may not even be able to tell you what - and that she needs to go explore and find out what it is.

You can 1) wait for her to hopefully come to her senses or 2) you can also date others and see if she is the only darling walking the earth.

Chin up, carry on. Ask other people out. AND don't let her see you crumple up into a pitiful ball.

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Say "Bye-bye."

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@Peebles1,

I'm with Set on this one. Say goodbye. She is obviously not committed to the relationship.

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@Peebles1,

Leave her, this instant - send her an email telling her that you don't that sort of behaviour, and consequently her, in your life. Don't answer her phone calls.

She wants you as her fall back option (ie if she doesn't find someone she really likes, she will 'settle' for you, so that she is not lonely). It's an incredibly disrespectful thing to suggest.

If you let her walk over you like this, she will have no respect for you (why respect you if you don't respect yourself. Why respect you if you put up with bad behaviour and let yourself be trampled over?)

edit : in respect to the email - I would suggest this method because it allows you to set your thoughts, and not have her argue with you. If you allow her to argue, she will seek a way to blame you for her behaviour. Normally a breakup deserves a face to face, but not this sort of behaviour.

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@Peebles1,

Quote:

even took the brunt of her deppression and loneliness

You are an idiot...you will get zero credit from her for this.

Quote:

the last thing i told her was that I will always love her no matter what she does to me

Again,You are an idiot. This is over, try to not be bitter about it, and do better next time.

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@Peebles1,

You wrote, "the last thing i told her was that I will always love her no matter what she does to me and that i would always be there if she needs my help or someone to talk to."

Please explain why she deserves this sort of blind loyalty. They key phrase 'you will always love her no matter what she does to me' is very worrisome indication about your emotional health.

Perhaps you should rethink where you are going in the relationship and why exactly you are in one. How are your needs being met? Unless you are a masochist, that is not healthy or rewarding, to say the least.

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my gf wants to date other people till the end of this month

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