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My boss have a problem with me

 
 
Angel23
 
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 03:15 am
Why do I always freak out over every little thing at work?
My coworkers said I make them nervous whenever I act like the world's gonna end over every little thing. Sometimes I would spontaneously sigh or wear a scowl on my face. I only do that in the back room though, not the sales floor. I don't mean to really. Work sometimes get stressful. My boss said that's becoming an issue and she can't have someone like that on her team. How do I stop stressing over everything?

I get easily overwhelmed and shyt and I got criticized a lot for that lately. My coworkers don't like the way they feel around me, but I still get along with all of them. Still, how do I stop myself from doing this? Selling and staying organized is no longer my problem, but I'm at a loss on this one.

So help? Thx
 
PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 07:10 am
If these are specific problems or issues because of something that happens at work, perhaps having one person to talk to would help. Is there one person on staff that can mentor you?

If this is how you are in all areas of your life - home, work, community - then you might consider talking to someone about your anxiety. Do you have a counselor, pastor, older friend to talk to?

This all must be very stressful for you, so get some help with it.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 07:28 am
@PUNKEY,
I just hate getting bitched at. I'm so glad my coworkers r nice to me. Otherwise, I'd feel all alone.
jespah
 
  4  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 07:34 am
@Angel23,
Work can be stressful. This is true, no matter how old you are, where you are working, where you are in your career, what you do, etc.

Recognize that your coworkers are your coworkers, and your friends are your friends. And while there may be some overlap, the truth is, it's not complete, perfect overlap.

What that means is - cultivate your friendships outside of work, and complain to them about what is happening at work. This is clearly a part of the problem; your boss feels that it is undermining the team. What I am suggesting is, save the sighs, etc. for after hours. It may be difficult at times, but do your best.
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 07:49 am
Take in the corrections as lessons to be learned, not something against you personally.
0 Replies
 
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 10:28 am
@jespah,
Well, I never complained to them about anything. I'm talking like when I can't find something I need, I get panicky, things like that. I just get annoyed and overwhelmed easily and it's making ppl uncomfortable.
Butrflynet
 
  2  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 11:04 am
@Angel23,
The drama of your panics, annoyances and overwhelming decorum at work is having a negative effect on other employees. The other employees have told you this and now your boss is also telling you this.

It is up to you to decide if being employed at that company is important enough for you to change your behavior. It sounds as if you are on a fast track for being discharged from the company, so you may want to start looking for another job regardless.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 11:09 am
@Butrflynet,
Unless I step it up right? Btw, what do u mean by discharged from company? It was that bad?
Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 11:19 am
@Angel23,
Discharged = fired
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 11:27 am
@Butrflynet,
I know what the word means. I just wanna kno y I would be canned for that.
0 Replies
 
Ragman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 11:36 am
@Angel23,
She (and you) are detailing a pathway towards your workplace approaching the 'slippery slope'. An essential in retail is for getting along (and getting cooperation) with management and fellow employees and forming a team. If your fellow employees see you suffering with panic attacks a great deal, they'll be less willing to team up with you..or bail you out when it becomes needed, for that matter.

The phrase 'Never let them see you sweat' comes to mind. It's acceptable that you could have an isolated problem here and there but when it becomes a repeated pattern, management has to step in create a remedial solution. Are you at that stage yet or prepared for this if it comes?
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 11:53 am
@Ragman,
Well I plan on stepping up from now on. I'll remember not to let them see me sweat lol. I nvr knew how bad it really was till I got on this site. I also understand y my boss was annoyed with me for this.
Ragman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 01:21 pm
@Angel23,
Please understand that I am sympathetic to this issue. Perhaps 'stepping it up' for you may mean stepping might it not result in less effectiveness? I haven't read back so forgive me if you've stated it but are you getting counseling about this anxiety issue?

My guess is that this behavior of your "getting annoyed and overwhelmed easily and it's making ppl uncomfortable" is something you've seen repeated outside of the workplace, at home with family, or at school or with friends? Let's be honest and objective now. This behavior doesn't come out of the blue..for most of us who suffer from anxiety related issues.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 01:31 pm
@Ragman,
I received counseling for other issues, which had been resolved. I'm about to mention my anxiety issues on my next appointment. Idk how I got this way. I guess I never really learned to handle stress. Also, the way I handled stress was tolerated at my last job. This will be a new adjustment.
Ragman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 01:48 pm
@Angel23,
As I stated before..I support your effort with this work problem. This is a bigger (more broad too) issue than I think you may realize. In some fashion, you already could have been discussing (a different facert of) anxiety and distress in counseling, so I suspect there could be some amount of denial on your part - based on some comments you've made; however, you seem to be following the right path to discuss this with a therapist and your new approach to co-workers.

At the workplace..consider this tactic...to try to shield your anxiety and distress from co-workers without making yourself crazy. This might be hard for you to do. If you find that it's hard, that could tell you something key about your suitability for success in that sort of work environment.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 01:50 pm
@Ragman,
I don't find it hard. I'm just starting to get help with that. I'll see how it pans out. All I need to do is cut the drama.
Ragman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 01:52 pm
@Angel23,
This is easier said than done. Awareness is at least half of the problem. If this was easy for you, you'd have been doing it already.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 01:55 pm
@Ragman,
I guess I nvr realized how severe it really was. My counselor will help on that part, as would god.
Ragman
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 02:08 pm
@Angel23,
Is that god or God? I'm unclear about too which deities you mean. Zeus and Thor just doesn't anwer any of their calls lately. Valhalla and Mt. Olympus must be getting renovation.

A saying comes to my mind, "God helps those who help themselves". A therapist may help you best with this issue. God's been a bit busy helping listening to Tim Tebow.
Angel23
 
  1  
Reply Mon 12 Mar, 2012 02:14 pm
@Ragman,
God. Sorry. I can't type with mobile devices. I'm a Christian.
 

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