Marrying the same woman, 2nd time around

I think marrying the same person a second time is pretty unusual, in and of itself.

And ultimately it's about whatever works for you guys.

That said, I can see why she'd want a new ring in terms of the symbolism (which is what the ring is all about after all). The old ring accompanied a lot of vows that turned out to not be kept. ("For better or for worse," etc.) The old ring is connected to an old marriage, that did not work out.

A new ring for a new marriage -- hopefully one that will last longer and work better -- makes some sense.

I don't know about the "dream ring" stuff but that would seem to be its own issue. If you happened to meet her 3 years ago for the first time and were getting married now, would you want to get her a "dream" ring?

From re-reading your post, you say that the "dream" ring was fine with you until someone else expressed surprise. If it's fine with you and it's what she wants, go for it IMO.

Does she still wear the ring from the first marriage?

You might consider having her old ring remade into a new one.

That's what I was going to suggest - until I remembered that many divorced gals take the ring and re-purpose it into a cocktail ring.

IMHO - give her a new ring to symbolize the new beginning between you two.

Two friends are remarrying after over 15 years apart. The reason for the divorce? overbearing mother of the husband and his brat kids from his first marriage. Still, they had a flame for each other all this time. Hope they have resolved these issues.

I'd go with a new one. Like Soz said, it's the symbolism. Plus a lot of ladies like bling and it's not like she asked for a new house...

I'd have more than a few second thoughts about any woman who gets so excited about a piece of glass. I can't think of many things that are more shallow.

Marriage is supposed to be for life, and has a lot of emotions attached especially to a woman.

I have a stunning ring from my first marriage. I wouldn't dare re-model that one for this forthcoming marriage as there is a feeling of bad karma, attached to that thought.

She may think the same, even though it's the same woman. It didn't work out the first time..

A new ring is a new beginning... What I would do, is I would sell the other ring and use the money to add to this new ring.

The ring is then gone... The money used wisely, and if she was to say no to that, I'd question why she then wants a new ring.. then to me it's materialistic.

You said she was excited about it, and you were fine about it until someone else said something.

Why are you letting someone else put doubts in your mind?

This is something between you and her, and no one else.

Personally - while the ring is important (due to tradition), I'd also find a new symbol as well (if she is agreeable to such). ie two symbols for the new marriage.

Put it this way - last time was sealed with a ring. I personally don't think the second time around a ring would have the same significance, even if it was her 'dream ring' - because the knowledge is always there that it was done and broken (probably one of the reasons she is aiming for her 'dream ring'). As an example : hand written vows, in your own words, framed and hung on a wall side by side in your home (of course this carries risks if you have a big argument, but it's an example of what I mean)

What about for you? Will a ring really have the same meaning?

My guess, that you 'were fine until someone expressed surprise' is that you hadn't really thought about it, and now it doesn't seem quite right anymore.

Look b4343,

It's not obvious to give another ring, when you are marrying second time, with the same girl. But keeping in mind, her excitement about the ring, you should give her second ring, also. It hardly matters you, if you really love her.

However, if you don't love her, and you are doing this, just for her sake, then it's your wish, to give that ring or not.