Anyone care to join me for breakfast?

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Matilda stopped in this morning for a little lovemaking before she has to go off to her job down at McGurdle's Tires and Pretzels. We made passionate love for about, oh, I'm guessing around three and a half minutes, and then I had to have a cigarette as I watched her put her clothes back on. She's a damn fine-lookin' woman. I've been blessed to have so many women in my life.

The thing I like about Matilda is her ability to cook an excellent breakfast. Some of the other women are just in it for the excitement ... the three and a half minutes of bliss, as they like to call it.

Priscilla can make some mighty fine dessert items, but her cooking skills are generally not up to my standards.

So, Matilda is gonna make some bacon and eggs this morning. She's outside right now preparing the bacon.

If anyone of you cares to join us, just take Route 32 five miles or so east of Biggsville and then turn left where old man Jensen used to park his tractor. Another two miles down the road and turn by the rusted manure spreader. The Ratzenhofer Farm is just up a piece on the right hand side.

See you there. I better go see if Matilda needs help with the bacon.

http://www.crystalcreeklodge.com/images/eskimo.jpg

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Thanks for the offer - but I guess I will pass this time. Do let me know when Matilda's husband stops over.

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i'll be there. three and a half minutes, you say? i will be on the lookout for them capybaras, i hear they get mightily jealous.

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On my way Gus. I knew I was shoveling and snowblowing all night for a reason. Something told me that I better get the driveway cleared by morning and whataya know, I get an invitation for breakfast. I'll just throw on my best overalls and I'll be right over.

That Matilda is one fine lookin lady Gus and I know you're just lookin to show her off. Doesn't bother me none though, because she sure does know how to work a slab of meat.

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Sorry, I just finished off a pitcher of Mimosas for breakfast (hic), so I won't be driving anywhere for a while...but I must say, you two make a fine looking couple.

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"turn left where old man Jensen used to park his tractor." sounds like the kind of directions they give around here. Like 'You know that road right there where them three brown cows were standing last week? The one that goes down a couple miles and under the power lines? Well, that's not where you turn."

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ROFLMAO!!!!

..that's not were you turn...

wiping tears of laughter with my sleeve

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I think it's beatiful, Gus, that you and your sister Matilda have such a close and loving relationship.

Reminds me of Uncle Steve. Except he's not really my uncle.

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Roger, leave NM and you'll actually miss getting directions like that!

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I've never had salmon bacon before. I bet it's tasty.

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This is just an update to let everyone know what they missed. Montana and Dagmaraka were the only ones who took me up on my breakfast invitation. They both showed up at the same time, precisely when Matilda was putting the food on the picnic table.

The four of us ate a hearty breakfast, laughed and kidded each other about the things going on in our respective lives, and then had a pleasant glass of wine in the shade of the old willow tree down by the swamp.

Montana and Dag really hit it off with Matilda. I think the three of them are going shopping down at McGurdy's Mall later on this week.

After the wine I took Dag and Montana on a tour of the farm. They both were awestruck by the slender lorises and had a lot of questions for me and Matilda.

We played a game of Twister after viewing the animals and that was great fun.

Suddenly Dag looked at her watch and said, "Oh, look at the time. I have to get to work."

Montana said, "Yep, I've got some stuff to do at home."

So, they both left. But I won't forget this day for a very long time.

It was special.

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Three and half minutes!!!!???!!!
Even when I stretch it out, in words, it's not very long Gus.
Maybe, you think your spoilin' the wimmin around the ol' homestead, but gosh gus, they cook for you, give 'em a few more minutes of your extra special lovin', or do it twice... I'm sure they'll appreciate it.
Let me know, maybe next invite I'll show up...he hehe he

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Sheeesh, I coulda done that in 2 and a half...

but then again who wants to travel to Europe???

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gus, next time use seconds.

3.5 minutes=210 seconds.

sounds better that way............

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Yup I'm with the owl

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Yup, we had a great old time. Hell, I haven't had that much fun since we all took that lawn tractor trip in Gus's stretch lawn tractor.
Had to hose down my car when I got home because I drove through a large puddle of manure, but it was well worth it. Gus's favorite cow Hilda came and licked him in the face while we were sitting down eating and it was the sweetest thing. Gus smiled and gave her a nice big smooch on the lips and you could tell that Hilda was in her glory. Dag and I did a little mud wrestlin for old times sake and then we went to wash up at the swamp before breakfast. On the way home I drove through the manure puddle again, but this time I remembered to close my windows, so it was all good.

Thanks for the wonderful breakfast Gus and be sure to thank Matilda for me as well. I took a lovely picture of Matilda with her butcher knife and I'll be sure to make copies for her ;-)

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Gautam wrote:

Thanks for the offer - but I guess I will pass this time. Do let me know when Matilda's husband stops over.

hey, she looks like a guy!

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Ah yes, and I can finally type again. It was a grand breakfast, although something should be done about those gadflies. i was amazed by the looks of matilda considering she gets about 50 gadfly stings a day. mudwrestling helped to cool off and i had a quiet day at work - nobody asked me to do a thing or attempted to speak to me. not that i could speak anyway. funny how the cattle gets fed and the hay gets cut and the chicken's eggs make it into the baskets even when i am not on my farm.
thank you gus for the thoughtful gifts as well. i gave a little bit of bacon to marty, remember the unfortunate fella who fell off a motorcycle on his bare head? he seemed happy, as far as i can tell. oooh, but the itching, the itching. gus, send me some of that cream matilda made out of pig ears for your gadfly stings, if you can!

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http://www.tgpa.org/images/stpetetimes/uzbek2_large.jpg

and here's a photo from our joyful breakfast so you have something to remember us by, gus.

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You and Montana look so hot in those garbs.

So...it was....NAKED...mud wrestling, right?

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Anyone care to join me for breakfast?

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