Random!!

I think you asked Eva and not me, but since I was talking about that, YES it was hard. I really hated being that poor. I had the bare minimum (roof over my head, adequate if gross veggie food in my tummy, enough clothes for warmth) but the pure utilitarianism got to me. I'm someone who likes fashion and I just couldn't afford the things I really wanted/ liked. Did a lot of nosing around at Goodwill, and even then things could be too expensive for me. (I made maybe one $5 clothes purchase from Goodwill/ month, if that.)

And the gross veggie food was really wearing. (Veggie food can be delicious, this was usually gross. It was more a function of the skill level of the cooks and the food budget than the veggieness per se.) I'd really want to have a great dinner at a good restaurant, but it was just not affordable for me.

So, that all sucked and when I got a job and started making some actual money it was pure bliss to be able to splurge now and then.

But I did find ways. In addition to Goodwill finds (and I found some amazing stuff in the $1-$5 range), I'd go to the farmer's market 10 minutes before they closed, and come away with armfuls of fresh flowers for a fraction of their regular cost (they throw away anything that doesn't sell at the market, and they were sympathetic to the starving student). I mentioned elsewhere recently that one store would put out their empty cardboard soap boxes for anyone to take, and I figured out when they would do that every week and hover and swoop in and get the prettiest ones -- for free! Things like that to add a little color and pleasure to my life for very little money.

And of course I was a student at a very nice university. There were lots of gorgeous buildings where I could hang out for free, so it wasn't all squalor.

Overall it was a very good experience and I'm not sure I'd change much about it. I grew up without much money either but the thrift that was forced upon me once I was on my own taught me a lot.

And college itself was amazingwonderfulfantasticthebest. Highly recommended.

Yeah, don't worry about the money now. When the time comes to get serious about applying for colleges, your dad will let you know what he can afford. You may even have a college counselor at your high school that can help with scholarship searches when you get to be a junior or senior.

It wasn't that hard to get by...I just worked! You don't need expensive clothes when you're in college. That doesn't start until you begin interviewing for jobs. And we didn't have cell phones or internet access then, so I didn't have to worry about that. It's amazing how much free or almost-free entertainment there is around colleges. Live music is everywhere, poetry slams are free, $1 movies, you name it. Nobody has much money, so everything is cheap. Even restaurants near the campus are lower priced than in the rest of town. I loved college life. It was FUN! I hung out at friends' places on weekends...we all did.

One thing...I didn't go the sorority route. It didn't appeal to me. Of course, that drastically cut down on my expenses, too! And I wasn't into drinking or drugs, which are a major expense for some. For awhile, anyway...until they flunk out.

Why did I get married? Oh man, that's a whole thread in itself!!! I won't bore you with the details! I was just a few months short of 20 years old, which sounds VERY young now, but in those days it was very common. A lot of people got married right after high school graduation. That's rare today. Anyway, today most parents would keep paying for their child's education even if they did get married, but that wasn't the case back then. My parents and I all expected that if I wanted to be married, that meant I wanted to be on my own. And I did want to be on my own.

The marriage lasted about 5 years. I got divorced when I was 24. Why? Duh! Because I got married too young, of course! What did I learn? I found out the hard way that there is a HUGE difference between wanting to do something and being ready to do it.

Short story: I wanted to be married. But I hadn't had enough experience with relationships to recognize a bad one when it came along.

Isn't it amazing how a few years of scraping by will motivate you to improve your lifestyle?! Within 10 years, most of those college friends of mine who once complained about the price of a pizza were buying nice houses, new cars, and taking great vacations. Nothing quite like poverty to light a fire under you!

Well, atleast it was fun! I dont wanna be poor though. GoodWill and veggies? No way, jose! Sounds like I should start saying money now. I guess going away for college is worth being poor for a little while though. Im excited!

Hey, one more question! Will you pay for your daughters college or will she have to work and stuff like you did?

Yea, I dont think I wanna be in a sorority either. What would be the point.

Getting marriage right after high school is crazy! You wouldnt even get a chance to be a real grown up and have fun yet. I think thats part of what happened with my parents. They had kids too young and it messed everything up.

When I start college, I wanna be on my own but I still kinda want my dad to help me. It sounds hard to be on your own in college. Hard, but fun!

Being poor in college just ain't the same as being poor in society, GG.

No, it really isn't. It's kind of an adventure.

My financial situation was pretty extreme I think, it's not that bad for most college kids -- I brought it up though in terms of bringing a dose of reality to the whole "off to college!" glamour thing.

Saving money now is a great idea! Do you work?

I don't plan to pay for ALL of my daughter's college but I plan to pay for a fairly good chunk of it. One wrinkle is that my husband is a professor which means she gets 1/2 off if she goes to the university where he teaches (and it's a good university). Unless something changes between now and college applications, she probably will have a pretty good choice of colleges (she's very smart and does well in school and also does a lot of athletics, etc.) So while I'd love to save the money, I really don't want her to feel pressured to go to the local university. She keeps saying (unprompted) that she wants to, I say "we'll see."

(There is also the possibility that she'd get scholarships, but that's not something I'll plan on.)

No, I don't work. I get about 10 dollars allowance every week if I'm not grounded though. So if I saved like half of that a week, it could be lots of money in 2 years!


Aww! That's cool, she's lucky!

It'd be $520! (Well, plus interest, but that probably wouldn't add more than $50 max.) That would definitely help as goofing-around money (you could buy a fair amount of clothes for that) but in terms of the room and board stuff (place to live and food to eat) that's bubkes, unfortunately.

If you're 2 years away, definitely worth talking to your dad about financial plans.

Frankly, I'd be more than terrified if my 15 year old would go to college with
18/19 year olds, never mind being in a dorm room together. A friend of mine whose son also went to college at 16, opted to have him stay home and commute every day to UCSD which wasn't far from his house. The boy had a really tough time the first year, he was just too young for the regular college crowd and they had quite different interests than him.

I can easily see that being a difficulty.. though maybe not always.

I wonder about a year abroad program -
I'll show my ignorance here, as I don't know about equivalencies over in Europe (say) for their sixteen and seventeen year olds. I could see living with a family and doing a year or so more of non-university level, as I keep hearing about how european education is more advanced, harder than ours in the u.s.

We had an italian exchange student live with my cousins, and one cousin go over there for a semester or two, when they were respectively sixteen and seventeen. If it would work, it wouldn't be a step back but a learning experience re language and culture (et al) and age relevant. They stayed with each others families, and remain lifelong friends. I heard a lot of good stories about what fun they both had, along with various shocks about how different cultures deal every day.

I don't remember the intricacies of being an exchange student, that it necessarily means it's a two way thing.

Yes, we do this a lot within Europe, osso. I don't know why it won't catch on
more successfully here in the States. It's such a great experience for anyone to live a year abroad. My German friends had a Brazilian teenager for a year at their house and now their son is going to Brazil for a year in exchange. Both teens have formed a deep friendship that will last them a lifetime, I am sure.

I was in England for some time (not an entire year but several weeks) when I was around 16/17 years old - I have such fond memories of it (sans the food though )

That was the advantage for my cousin in going to Italy, hah. Not so much so for the girl from Torino going to later-1950's Los Angeles, to your basically midwestern US food type family. I seem to remember her being sometimes horrified.

How old are the teens there when they get out of whatever levels end just before university? I have this vague idea that they are eighteen or nineteen rather than sixteen or seventeen.

They finish high school around 18/19 - just like here, but mostly they're 16 when applying for a year abroad.

I guess I have it skewed from my careless reading - I thought they finished a year later, probably since I finished at 17, 18th birthday being in November, and I didn't skip any grades. What I was getting at is that if they have an extra year there, maybe she could participate in that. Oh, well. Or maybe do an exchange at 16, not only the application.

Let me know where you get that kind of interest and I'll be on it like a tick on a dawg.

520 bucks?! Cool!!

Aww! Why would you be terrified?