Married off

Yeah, I'm glad that no one has the right to marry me off, too. I disagree with it all, but then a culture has to be sufficient for the people whom it serves to survive.

I agree. I couldn't even imagine anyone making that choice for me.

Are ALL marriages in Pakistan arranged? Is it possible for your friend to tell her parents that she wants to choose her own spouse?

It's still widely practiced in India also.

I thought i had read recently that a woman successfully appealed to Canada for asylum in order to avoid being forced into an arranged marriage. I can't recall the details, but it might be worth checking out.

All is fair in marriage and war, Set.

A friend of mine from India recently wed. It was arranged by his parents but he looked at a lot of pictures and read a lot of profiles before agreeing on a particular woman. I don't know if that's a common practice.

It is a common practice and depending on how traditional the parents are she could be in trouble if she refuses. There have been a number of cases in Britain, which has a large Pakistani population, where fathers or brothers have killed the daughter for refusing to enter into an arraigned marriage. Traditionally an arraigned marriage is for the benefit not only of the couple but for the two families involved The goals are general economic or "political" (social status or influence) and the needs and desires of the couple are seen as less significant than those of the larger kin groups.

Oh, arranged marriages are definitely a common practice in India and Pakistan. I meant (and I should have been clearer) that I'm unsure whether his right of refusal is a common practice.

Jes, I think (this is from reading a lot of Indian novels, so not exactly authoritative) that the men have a lot more say in this than the women. As in, while the man may be able to look through a lot of profiles and choose, the woman then is either faced with a lot of pressure to accept the choice made by her FAMILY. I think there is usually some sort of a meeting, where the prospective bride and groom meet, and they have power of veto then.

Gautam???