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ABUSIVE HUSBAND

 
 
Reply Mon 21 Mar, 2011 10:22 am
I NEED HELP ASAP..MY HUSBAND IS REAL ABUSICE HITS ME YELLS AT ME CALLS ME NAMES (MEAN NAMES) IM 5 MONTHS ALONG WIT A BABY GIRL AND I WANNA LEAVE HIM I DONT WANT HIM THERE WHEN I HAVE HER..IM IN CHICAGO IL...IS THIS POSIBLE? CAN I NOT HAVE HIM THERE ? IM WORRIED WHAT HE'LL DO TO MY BABY.
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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 1,401 • Replies: 6
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manored
 
  0  
Reply Mon 21 Mar, 2011 10:51 am
@beccAy0y0,
Writing everything with capslock on makes it difficult to understand.

Id need to know way more than that about your husband to give reliable advice, but as far as I know the standart procedure is to seek the help and protection of the police, notably the ones specialized in protecting women against that kind of abuse.
jespah
 
  1  
Reply Mon 21 Mar, 2011 11:09 am
@manored,
I'd advise going to a computer outside the home so that there is no trail, say, at the Public Library, and Google Women's Shelters Chicago.

Or you can ask the librarian -- they can provide resource info.

You can also go to the cops -- before or after.

Another suggestion, begin to get together your money. Transfer funds if you must, give them to a trusted friend or family member to hold, whatever. You are gonna need $$ and this is the time to grab it.
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Always Eleven to him
 
  1  
Reply Mon 21 Mar, 2011 02:28 pm
@beccAy0y0,
I agree with Jespah's response about Googling women's shelters, Chicago, and about doing that on a computer other than the one in your home.

First -- Get yourself set up in a women's shelter. Your doctor should also have information about women's shelters in your area. You need to GET OUT of the abusive situation.

Second -- Either through the women's shelter or the police or your local court, get yourself a protective order that says that he is not to contact you in any way and that specifically mentions not coming to the hospital for the child's birth.

Third -- get yourself a lawyer. If you cannot afford a lawyer, contact your local legal aid program, again Google legal aid chicago (or whatever town you are in outside of chicago proper). If legal aid can't help, contact the Illinois Bar Association for a referral for a divorce lawyer who can help you pro bono (without charge).

Hope that helps, and I'll be sending lots of positive energy and thoughts your way.
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amber622
 
  2  
Reply Wed 30 Mar, 2011 07:06 pm
Brining a child into any sort of abusive relationship 1) will not change who your husband is and 2) your putting yourself and child at risk. You need to take action by seeking somewhere to go, whether it is a shelter or getting in touch with a family member who will take you in until you get back on your feet. You already took a huge step by saying you want out, now you just need to follow through, not only for yourself, but for your unborn childs sake.

I hope you make contact with a friend or family member and get all the support possible.
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Rdp12209
 
  0  
Reply Sat 28 May, 2011 05:32 pm
@manored,
First issue- who cares about her CAPLOCKS! She is asking for help!! I just moved away from Chicago a year ago. It is a great city full of help! Call the non -emergency assistance number (start with dialing "0"if you don't know it.) Tell them to connect you to a domestic violence shelter or domestic violence advocate from the police department. Tell her story. That's it. They take over from there and help is on it's way. Just be honest with police and caseworkers. I agree with the other posts - ask people at the library and search the Internet if you are uncomfortable. You can always call around or ask various people things and tell them you are calling for info to help your sister or friend.
manored
 
  0  
Reply Sun 29 May, 2011 09:59 am
@Rdp12209,
Rdp12209 wrote:

First issue- who cares about her CAPLOCKS! She is asking for help!!
Like I said, it makes the post difficult to understand. Also, there are many overly dramatic people on the internet who write in all-caps for absolutely no reason other that calling attention, oftenly over trivial matters, so many people (like me) usually ignore said posts. Writing in all caps is also a common practice among trolls. She is more likely to get good help/advice if she writes normally.

Also, this thread is quite old, the OP has probaly already solved her problems by now, specially since she has posted no response yet. Or perhaps it was a troll.
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