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Delayed Gratification

 
 
Reply Sun 13 Feb, 2011 08:01 pm
Alright, I would call it self-control. I think it is a desirable trait. Until 10:30 this morning, when my older son IM'ed me, I thought I admired self-control because I was raised a Roman Catholic.

However, while we were talking about something else as he was waiting for clearance to leave Manas Air Force Base, he mentioned something about the person under discussion eating the marshmallow. What does that mean, I asked? He told me about the marshmallow study.

Supposedly, people who are able to use self-control -- who can delay gratification -- will be more successful in life.

Interesting.

http://www.marketing.fm/2009/07/21/dont-eat-the-marshmallow-yet-ted-talk/
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Feb, 2011 08:14 pm
@plainoldme,
Quote:
Supposedly, people who are able to use self-control -- who can delay gratification -- will be more successful in life
You were not aware of this before now I take it.....
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Sun 13 Feb, 2011 08:15 pm
@hawkeye10,
Nope. Lots of people with self-control are very poor although they are intellectually successful.

I've raised the issue of self-control here before and was hissed at by your side of the aisle.
hawkeye10
 
  0  
Reply Sun 13 Feb, 2011 10:21 pm
@plainoldme,
Quote:
I've raised the issue of self-control here before and was hissed at by your side of the aisle
My side? I think I am the only Zen Leftist around here, there is no side only me.

However, do you recall the argument? To build anything great requires work, and a person needs to be able to resist sinking into enjoying what has been built so far and keep building. Those who have no ability to delay gratification can not do it. This is a no brainer, I would be surprised if very many people disputed this.
plainoldme
 
  2  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 07:04 am
@hawkeye10,
Come on, you a Zen Leftist?! That's satire, right? Your responses are always to the right and your anger suggests anything but Zen.

I find the right totally self-indulgent and totally without interior control and dismissive of external control.
Ticomaya
 
  2  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 08:03 am
@plainoldme,
I find the left to be a bunch of dope-smokin, tree-huggin, hippies.
Setanta
 
  2  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 08:10 am
So what? You started this thread to start a political fight? Jeeze . . .

My little dog can delay gratification. I let the dogs out back several years ago, after which they are accustomed to being given a charcoal treat. There is a game we sometimes play, "is that my treat?"--in which i pretend to take the treat away, and the doggies growl and pretend to threaten me if i try.

That morning, i gave the charcoal treat to the little doggie girl, and then stood on the stoop outside to smoke a cigarette. I stood there somewhat longer, and then came back inside. The girl dog was lying on the floor of the living room, with the charcoal treet between her pasw. She has waited until i came back inside because she wanted to play "is that my treat?"--she had delayed her immediate gratification in order ot enjoy an additional gratification.

Dogs can do this, it is stupidity to suggest that people can't do it just because you despise their political views. What a jerk.

(I do agree that Hawkeye is full of **** to describe himself as a liberal or a leftist, however.)
rosborne979
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 10:36 am
@plainoldme,
plainoldme wrote:
Alright, I would call it self-control.

In my opinion, Self Control is the only true power that exists in the world, and those that have it have essentially unlimited potential. It applies to a lot more than marshmallows and "success".
PUNKEY
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 11:05 am
Plain - thanks for posting that. Interesting to see how children from different cultures responded.

I think lack of restraint is a big problem in the US.
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 08:30 pm
@Ticomaya,
Quote:
I find the left to be a bunch of dope-smokin, tree-huggin, hippies.


In what year did you make this discovery?
0 Replies
 
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 08:33 pm
@Setanta,
Oooo! Testy, are we?

No, I did not start a thread to start a political fight. I never look to start a political fight. In fact, I generally seek to avoid fights but I will not be pushed around. Unfortunately, hawkeye was the first to respond. Hawkeye likes to fight so that he can call other people names.

I started a thread to discuss self-control, something that I see as totally lacking at the present time. Self-denial would be more like it. If your dogs can exercise self-control, self-denial or delayed gratification, then your dogs are superior to most humans.
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 08:34 pm
@rosborne979,
That is interesting. Do you see people controlling themselves? I do not. I still think that Catholicism colored my life view.
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Mon 14 Feb, 2011 08:38 pm
@PUNKEY,
I see lack of restraint in the same way. Look at how much credit card debt people carry. It is true that temptation is all around us. It even comes into our homes in the form of catalogs. While I never had the urge to "keep up with the Joneses," I do find myself drooling over pretty things.

On the national level, a lack of judicious spending has left us with crumbling infrastructure and massive debt as monies are directed away from needs, like sound bridges, toward silly projects, like bridges to nowhere.
0 Replies
 
wayne
 
  2  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 05:12 am
This sounds a little simplistic to me. A lot of those great successes depend on the lack of restraint among the general populace. American capitalism is based upon the buy now/ pay later philosophy. Moderation is a sound philosophy, but what might the world be like if we all did it?
There is also a certain amount of risk involved in delayed gratification. Most of us are familiar with the guy who denies himself all his life and drops dead 6 days into his retirement.
Setanta
 
  3  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 05:22 am
@plainoldme,
I'm not being testy, i'm calling it as i see it. You immediately took the opportunity to demonize those with whom you disagree politically, and not because you had any good reason, but just because you disagree.
rosborne979
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 06:45 am
@plainoldme,
plainoldme wrote:
That is interesting. Do you see people controlling themselves?

No. Most people have very poor self discipline. But just think what we could do with perfect self control. Weight loss would be easy, drug addiction a non-problem. Get up every morning at 5:30 for a jog...
0 Replies
 
PUNKEY
 
  2  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 07:36 am
"American capitalism is based upon the buy now/ pay later philosophy."

No . . . not really. I see lots of impulsive purchases made in cash.
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 10:17 am
@wayne,
I can give you a better example against delayed gratification. The cabinet maker who built the kitchen cabinets for our first home wanted to apply bricks to the front of his house. He had estimates done when he and his wife bought the house and, being a thrifty person by nature and a man who income fluctuated with the work he contracted to do, he set up a savings plan. When he had sufficient funds to pay for the work, he learned the price was significantly higher. He paid the amount he had saved and financed the remainder.

Often, there are times when it might be economically more feasible to borrow money for a job, which, in this case was based on personal preference rather than need.

I also have a story that supports delayed gratification.

When we enlarged the third floor of our second house by raising a dormer, we could not install the floor immediately. We took estimates that summer but did not have the money. During the middle of winter, my ex received a bonus that allowed us to pay cash for the work. We took new estimates and found that construction workers, unable to do outdoor work, had lowered the price of installation just to have work. IT was not our intention to delay the job but it paid off for us and for the young man who laid the floor.
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 10:18 am
@Setanta,
No. You aren't 100% correct. I would have to reread his post to answer and I haven't time now.
plainoldme
 
  1  
Reply Tue 15 Feb, 2011 10:22 am
@PUNKEY,
That's true. Plus, our merchants encourage impulse buys. Store clerks are told to promote add-ons to sales. My favorite retail experience was just before parents' weekend during my daughter's freshman year of college. I bought some thin black cotton knee socks, the sort called pants socks, to take with me for the weekend. As I handed them to the sales clerk, she said, "Would you like some pants to go with your socks?" I laughed because I knew she was disgusted with the management that pushed her to push the customers. I told her I appreciated her black humor.
0 Replies
 
 

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